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Why do women have to go through so much trauma just for being women? Who gives men the right to behave in this way?
Trigger warning: This post contains depiction of normalised violence against women, and may be triggering for survivors.
#OneOfTheThingsThatOftenKeepMeUpAllNight
My belly is living proof of the life I have grown, held, and birthed a ‘permanently pregnant’ swell stretch marks and a caesarian scar that still itch an experience I wouldn’t trade in for anything except for what I was told by the father of my child.
From “This is not my child” to “Stop all that drama – there’s no camera here” when I was hormonal and weepy and wanted him to hold me, reassure me, understand me and further on to “you’ve blown up like a buffalo; like your mother” when I was unable to shed all the weight and “get back into shape”.
I never lost the weight and the swollen belly and the stretch marks “You look positively ugly” “I hate women who get fat” “I am embarrassed to be seen with you”.
Nothing new.
Poor guy he’s been embarrassed by so much about this uncouth wife of his talks too loudly laughs too loudly can’t even do anything right looks like a buffalo or an elephant take your pick.
Whattodo I am like that only na on top of that there’s the “too much feminism” the “rot” that I have “brought into this family” of course.
Sometimes I wonder what all my mind has taken who had sold me the narrative that I must be accepting, tolerant, resilient, “good”, understanding…
WHY? why must I? who gives him this right to do with me as he wished so say to me what he wished lord and master, right? taken with fire and family as witness.
Sometimes I wonder who am I?
The go getter who could do it all who had dreams or this broken sorry example of a human being who just gets through each day, one day at a time?
Image source: YouTube/ a still from Gully Boy
Closet feminist. read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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