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Curiosity about sex and sexuality is natural and inevitable in teenagers, and banning sale of contraceptives will only make our kids secretive instead of safe.
We can assume that in a country with a population of over 140 crore human beings, there is a lot of sexual intercourse happening. In spite of this fact however, we as a nation are terribly squeamish of anything to do with sex. It is seen as something to be hidden away, something that must not be spoken about, specially before kids.
Some parents pretend as though sex doesn’t even exist and we are all born of immaculate conception! The recent news about the refusal to sell contraceptives to minors is actually a result of this attitude.
‘Can’t sell condoms, contraceptives to minors’https://t.co/WxI2ebllG3 — Bangalore Mirror (@BangaloreMirror) January 18, 2023
‘Can’t sell condoms, contraceptives to minors’https://t.co/WxI2ebllG3
— Bangalore Mirror (@BangaloreMirror) January 18, 2023
The Bangalore Mirror has reported that the Karnataka state’s Drugs Control Department has issued a diktat to pharmacy outlets. According to the report, the department has issued a circular to drug retailers not to sell contraceptives to minors.
The reason for this is said to be the recent incident where a random checking of bags in schools had surprise results. They were looking for cell phones and found contraceptives, cigarettes and so on in the bags of students as young as grades VII, IX and X. Now while parents would understandably be shocked, this may not necessarily be a cause for worry.
Smart! That will stop teens from havi.. oh wait, it won't!Never miss real stories from India's women.Register Now — Nishanth Saka (@nishanth_vishnu) January 18, 2023
Smart! That will stop teens from havi.. oh wait, it won't!
— Nishanth Saka (@nishanth_vishnu) January 18, 2023
As the tweet above points out, banning contraceptives is unlikely to be effective. During adolescence, with all those raging hormones, sexual curiosity is only natural. If a child wants to explore those new-found sensations, this is natural too.
While a lot of parents are exceedingly uncomfortable with the thought of their children as sexual beings, maybe this is a discomfort they need to overcome. It is unfortunate that most kids get their ‘sex education’, such as it is, from peers, porn and hearsay. They don’t get it from reliable and safe sources such as a parent or teacher or other trusted adult.
Minor girls getting married is not an issue for the government. But minors using condoms and contraceptives should be contained. What a ridiculous stephttps://t.co/KNDrJEWc3l — Parul Kulshrestha (@parul_kuls) January 19, 2023
Minor girls getting married is not an issue for the government. But minors using condoms and contraceptives should be contained. What a ridiculous stephttps://t.co/KNDrJEWc3l
— Parul Kulshrestha (@parul_kuls) January 19, 2023
What is unhealthy and unnatural is when kids bury their curiosity and burgeoning sexual awakening and hide it away as something to be ashamed of. It is unhealthy when sex is seen as something dirty; desire something to be ashamed of.
In particular, girls are made to feel a lot of shame and guilt around desire and sexual curiosity. It doesn’t help that so many families seem to repose family honour or ‘izzat’ in the chastity of their women.
Image source
Several studies, such as this American study have demonstrated the connection between lack of proper sex education and higher rates of teen pregnancy. Access to comprehensive sex education helps children satisfy their curiosity and encourages responsible behavior.
When parents don’t express revulsion or disapproval vis-à-vis sex, children are comfortable about approaching their own parents when they have a question about sex. This creates a safe space for kids and keeps the lines of communication open; all vital for a healthy attitude towards sex as well as a sense of self in children.
https://twitter.com/YesWeExistIndia/status/1615983218146283521
Banning is never a solution as we see repeatedly in the case of, say banned books or even alcohol prohibition. If people want to do something, they find ways to do it. Banning only serves to drive the activity underground; to be continued in unsafe and clandestine ways.
So, if the Karnataka drugs controller thinks that banning the sale of contraceptives will discourage teen sex, he is wrong. What he will end up doing is preventing safe teen sex.
Image source: a still from the film Gippi
A former lawyer, now freelance writer, fauji wife, mother, singer, knitter and lover of my own cooking, I have altogether too many opinions and too few convictions. The more I learn the more I am read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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