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While some people stood by her stand and applauded her, most with a patriarchal mindset felt threatened by her firm stand, saying - will she do this even in the future?
While some people stood by her stand and applauded her, most with a patriarchal mindset felt threatened by her firm stand, saying – will she do this even in the future?
A few days ago I watched a movie that had a scene of a groom refusing to wed the bride because he wanted a car. The bride’s family was baffled as it was an on the spot demand, and they weren’t able to fulfill it. The hero’s mother and one relative even become ready to sell their gold and jewelry just to fulfill his demands, so the wedding can happen. The heroine of the movie makes him realize the part he was dumb enough to understand, and eventually the wedding happens.
We live in a country where when a boy demands something it has been given to him promptly. Sometimes when it’s not given, the boy sticks by his demand until the parents bend to his stubbornness, and let him do what he wants. Then he grows up, carrying the same thing forward knowing his wishes are going to get fulfilled.
No one sees this as a bad thing; and most around him think it is his right. But when a girl does the same… she is mocked, her family is mocked; all hell breaks loose.
A line of mockery and subjective words thrown at her mention how her future will ruin if she behaves like this.
Recently a video of a bride demanding to play her favorite song for her entry became viral and honestly, a variety of views were expressed on it. Some of them favoured the bride, stating that it’s her only big day to celebrate, while some of them ‘pitied’ the groom for having such a ‘stubborn’ bride.
No one has a right to judge her in any way for having wished what she had visualised for her big day. In fact, she stood firm by it, refusing to enter the venue. She openly expresses her disappointment that her choice of song was not considered after having informed the organisers, and refuses to go in.
Many social media handles shared this video. While some people stood by her stand and applauded her, many people in the comments section saw it as stubbornness; most with a patriarchal mindset felt threatened by her firm stand, saying – will she do this even in the future?
We live in a society where the groom’s wishes are looked upon as an important thing to fulfill on priority, but when it comes to a bride, it becomes an objectionable incident. When a groom refuses to enter the wedding place with his stubborn dowry demands leaving a bride’s family in turmoil, shouldn’t that be called out as toxic behaviour instead of shaming a bride who only asked for a song to play?
How easily people, even women, commented on the bride for not adjusting, saying that it will be “tough going for the groom in the future”?
Well, the bride has demanded, and she might demand that she is heard and must get what she wants in the future as well. She has sent out an empowering message to all women, as well as to everyone out there who is pitying her and judging her for her actions. She won’t compromise further for her wishes in the name of adjustments. Why should a marriage work only if a woman, and only the woman, adjusts? It should be equal from both sides.
Best wishes to the bride who has taken a step further for her wishes and dreams. Even if they are small ones.
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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