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Does domestic violence account only for married women abused by their in-laws and husbands? Or does it also affect children born in such marriages?
The two words, ‘domestic violence’ are enough to run a chill down our spine, yet for some people, it has become their way of life. But does domestic violence account only for married women abused by their in-laws and husbands? Or does it also affect children born in such marriages?
You are affected by domestic violence whether or not you’ve been hit by someone in your family if you’ve consoled your younger siblings who are in a state of shock. And you are also affected by domestic violence if you’ve seen your mother’s sarees being torn during the abuse.
A strong feminist would write about men beating women but what about women who go through it and apply her fear to the children. In a typical household where domestic violence takes place, if a girl is born, she is expected to behave ‘well.’ She is expected to marry the ‘right person’ and leave the hell she was raised in.
Meanwhile, in the same house, if a boy is born, he, too, is expected to behave like a good son. But if this good son slaps his abusive father, he becomes the hero of the house. The mother makes the boy her armour while the son is guilty of doing what he did to his parent. He knows that the he has the power to control this abuse that some times violence can kill violence.
At the same time, the mother is not and cannot be blamed for making her son her shield. Don’t we all need protection? And often, protection from your offspring is security enough. But the children, in these cases, are emotionally constantly negative.
While watching the movie Karwaan, the late Irfan Khan says ‘my ammi threw me out of the house when I slapped my abusive father. I was perplexed on why, then I realised because she was used to the insults and abuse.” A lot of women cannot leave that life because there is no way out for them or because they are nurtured to be timid.
But these houses also produce headstrong men and women who have seen so much wrong, they don’t want to inflict the same upon anyone else. Isn’t that a silver lining here? Yes, it is a forced silver lining due to the amount of damage done to these people who have had to live in atrocious environments and have picked themselves up and reformed themselves. It takes months and years to rebuild yourself
Humans of Bombay has done many stories on these issues. And the common thread I have seen is the victims of domestic violence have stronger urge to discover the world. Their journey to rediscover life is a like a rainbow on a rainy day.
Picture credits: Still from Bollywood movie 2 States
A lawyer by qualification and a marketer by profession. A true believer of listening to ones gut to do the right thing! read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
It is shameful that in today's world too, women are abused and even killed for giving birth to a girl, and the infant's life is also of no value.
Trigger Warning: This deals with domestic violence, suicide, and violence against women, and may be triggering to survivors.
I am so glad that the esteemed courts are now giving the much-required verdicts regarding certain ideologies that were not at all entertained earlier. I mean we all have studied this much biology at our school level and it is our duty (our generation) to educate our elders about it.
Why someone have to lose a life to bring such awareness to the society. Delhi High Court gave this judgement concerning a case that filed by the deceased daughter’s parents against her in-laws. She committed suicide as she was harassed and tortured for dowry and giving birth to two daughters.
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