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Amidst the seemingly indomitable darkness that often engulfs us, there lies a light deep inside our hearts that we are oblivious to.
“Mom!” Her daughter’s voice brought her back into the present.
Since Raghav’s demise, Nia had gotten into this habit of zoning out frequently. She loved that safe haven she had created for herself. Her own little world where she could rant endlessly and cry her heart out. There was nobody here who would tell her to stop crying, to think of her child, to be strong. It had been almost a month but she was not over it yet. She found solace in thinking. Thinking all about past, future, the way things were, the way they could have been. It just brought back the pain and suffering but it also gave her some sort of masochistic pleasure.
She knew this was not helping her to move on but that temptation of revisiting the past where everything went on smoothly, was irresistible for her. She wanted to forget the reality and believe that everything was still the way it had been. She was not ready to shoulder the responsibility of bringing up a child, running a home, finding a job, all by herself. Daily household chores seemed like such a tiring task. Had it not been for her daughter, she won’t even bother getting up from bed at all.
She had just put her to sleep when the door-bell rang. Nia went to open the door.
“Hi Nia”, Divya said with a sad smile on her face.
“Hi. Please come in’, Nia replied.
They both sat down. “Would you like to have some tea? I was going to make some for myself.” Nia asked Divya.
“Okay”, Divya replied.
They sat silently for some time while having tea.
“How are you, Nia?” Divya questioned.
Nia didn’t say anything but her moist eyes said it all.
Divya paused and resumed, “Nia, I know things are difficult for you and it might not be the right time to tell you this but I can’t withhold it anymore. It is so unfortunate that despite being childhood friends we lost touch and we met again when you had lost your husband.”
“It happens Divya. You got married first and moved to Indore. Slowly we both went our own ways. We can’t control everything. Sometimes people just drift apart despite the bond”. Nia answered with a deep sigh.
“It’s not that. It’s about Raghav”, Divya said.
“Raghav? You don’t even know him. In fact, you never met him.” Nia said, irritated.
“Nia, I thought I hadn’t ever met Raghav but.. but I was wrong,” Divya said hurriedly.
“What do you mean?” asked Nia.
“I.. I saw him many times with Meera at parties and events. Meera was my colleague in Indore. When I saw your picture with him here, I was appalled. I wanted to tell you then only but you were shattered and heartbroken due to Raghav’s sudden death. I chose to remain silent but now when I look at your dull and sad face… I don’t want you to mourn that man anymore. I know its difficult for you but trust me I have reasons to believe that he was cheating you and..”
“I trust you Divya.” Nia looked at her and said.
“Did you know it already?” Surprised, Divya questioned her.
“No, I didn’t. But I get it. I can’t say that we had been in love with each other but we did share a cordial relationship. We ignored things we didn’t like about each other and concentrated on just running the household. This marriage and the home were sorts of a relief after spending so many years in turmoils of a dysfunctional family. We didn’t bother each other much. I had my daughter and he had his work. All I wanted was peace.” Nia had just started opening up her heart to Divya when her daughter entered the room crying.
Nia wiped away her tears and hugged her.
“Come here baby…” she comforted the child.
“See who has come to visit us. That’s Divya Aunty. Say hello”, she was talking to her daughter.
The child gingerly went to her. Divya smiled and opened her arms to receive her.
“What’s your name?” Divya asked.
“Meera”, the child replied sheepishly.
“MEERA?’’ Divya repeated and looked at Nia with confusion.
“Raghav named her. Give me a moment.” Nia said. Teary-eyed, she rushed towards her room. She sobbed silently when she wanted to wail. She noticed an envelope on her bed that she had found while looking for some documents. She opened it and read the words it contained.
‘Amidst the seemingly indomitable darkness that often engulfs us, there lies a light deep inside our hearts that we are oblivious to. All we need to do is awaken this source and let it guide us into our journey. No darkness would then be dark enough to stop you.’
She took a deep breath and placed the letter back into the envelope that read- ‘Read when the world seems like falling apart’.
A letter she had written to herself years ago, kept safe and forgotten all about. In the end, it had to be her own words that she was longing to hear. Words that would now guide her towards her life’s journey.
Image via Pixabay
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Mostly Normal is a book of innocence, longing, filial love, angst and acceptance, encapsulating a gamut of human emotions within its lightweight edifice. The book touches the human heart and will stay with you.
Some books enthral you till the last page, and then there are those that you stop reading after turning a few pages. Some books are a one-time read, while you carry some books with you long after you have read them. Then, once in a while, a book hits you so close to home that you find it difficult to slot into any category.
I will put Priyadeep Kaur’s Mostly Normal (BookSoul Reads, 2022) in this last bracket.
At a little less than hundred pages, Mostly Normal is a testimony of the power of words to inspire, irrespective of their length.
Most women do not get to live their lives the way they want, on their own terms. So why should they be tied down in their old age?
Every morning, while dropping the kids at the bus stop, I find a grandfather waiting with his granddaughter. I see him again when I fetch the kids. This has been the pattern for the last few years.
He is seen actively participating in his granddaughter’s activities, from morning and evening walks to attending her parent-teachers meeting, sending her for extracurricular activities to even planning her birthday party. He is admired by all. He is appreciated for making himself useful in his old age. People rave that the doting grandfather is doing his duty towards his children and grandchildren. The much-admired grandfather is also a widower, having lost his wife years ago to chronic disease. It’s also to be noted that both his son and daughter-in-law are working parents.
Every day, the onlookers appreciate his sense of duty and dedication. They say that this is how the elderly should keep themselves occupied. They should bring up their grandchildren while their children go off to work.
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