Raising Confident Girls: What’s Your Mantra?

Raising confident girls is first and foremost about giving them permission and encouragement to be themselves. Can you do that?

We were at a friend’s place a few days back for a weekend get-together. And a comment from a friend held my attention throughout the night and even beyond.

It led me to think of my daughter who is turning 10 in a couple of months. The ease with which she manoeuvred from a group of 2-3-year-olds to the teenager gang made me see a young grown-up girl ready to take on the world. So here I was resolving to have a candid chat on a lot of important life lessons with her.

I planned an outing with her the next weekend. We both went for an early morning walk in the park and after a few mins of connecting, I started my discussion with her. It was full of laughter, jokes and serious questions in between.

Here, I present to you the snapshot of the discussion, my key points on raising confident girls.

• Believe in the unique YOU, girl. A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking because its trust is not on the branch but on its own wings. Have trust in your own self, your own values, your own potential and life will be interesting.
• Be yourself. On the journey of life, you would meet a lot of people, you will like some and not gel with some, you would idealize some and be ignorant of others. Have an ideal in life but don’t copy them. You would lose your own self on your race to becoming someone you admire.
• Choose your clan. You are the average of the top 5 people you interact the most with. It’s important to choose your circle of friends wisely because that decides the direction and quality of your life.
• Live in the present and prepare for your future. Every thought that crosses your mind is laying the foundation for your future. Choose your thoughts and actions wisely so as to design the future that you would like. Live your life by design, not by default. Have a vision for your life my girl. Don’t just waste your life, living aimlessly. Have a purpose and stay focussed to achieve that in life.
• Have a mind of your own. Never give in to the people who feel that what you say is not important. You are important and intelligent enough to have an opinion of your own on any subject. And that opinion is invaluable.
• Solve problems, don’t create them. In life, you would be surrounded by many different kinds of people. A few of them will create issues, a few will discuss issues but only a few of them will have the courage and intention to solve the issues and lead others. Be amongst the leaders who solve the problems of the world.
• Participation is more important than wins. While I have always been a nagging mom who would want you to be perfect in everything you do, today I will share one of the very important expectations I have from you as my daughter: Participate and give it your best.
• Respect yourself. Life is full of lows and highs, challenges and opportunities, successes and failures which bring a rollercoaster of emotions inside your heart. And it is most important then to realize and respect your own emotions. Never be ashamed of your own feelings and emotions. Don’t do what you don’t like – a simple rule that will help you decide when in doubt. Do not do to others what you would not like to be done to you. Follow your heart and you would come out of a situation a winner.
• Don’t give up. Whatever the situation in life, just get up, dress up, show up and don’t give up.
• Love and spread more love. Feeling loved is the most important feeling in the world. If you could love yourself and others truly, half the battles of life are won even before beginning them.

Top image is a still from the movie Jab We Met

First published here

kushal singhal

Hi, I am Kushal Singhal. A Woman, A Mom to 2 lovely kids 13 & 6.

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