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That moment when you gain a new identity as 'mother of so-and-so' takes some getting used to. But it is precious too! Do you remember the first time someone referred to you this way?
That moment when you gain a new identity as ‘mother of so-and-so’ takes some getting used to. But it is precious too! Do you remember the first time someone referred to you this way?
“Shasya ki mummy”….I turned around to see a mother daughter pair walking towards me repeating the call, “Shasya ki mummy”. Seeing the blank look on my face, the lady enquired, “Aren’t you Shasya’s mother?” I nodded, still looking lost. The lady introduced herself as my daughter’s play school friend and conveyed what she had to. She left, leaving me with my thoughts.
It took me a while to absorb that someone had just referred to me as the mother of my three year old. Till that point my daughter was an extension of me. SHE was known as my daughter and not the other way around. It was odd but lovely in a warm, fuzzy way but it probably needed some getting used to.
This was seven years ago, and this year marks a decade of my motherhood. In all these years, this identity has grown on me and I unabashedly love it. Coming from someone who was big on the individuality thing, this means a lot. And what better day to admit this than on Mother’s Day. It’s my daughter who made me a mother, who made me aware of what it takes to be one. I’m a better person because of her.
From the first time I held her little hand in mine to the time she stroked my hair with those very hands to soothe my hurts, it’s been a great ride. As I take stock of the years, there’s not a single moment that I want to change. From the gurgles and the coos to the sleepless nights and diaper changing, I cannot think of anything I would have be different.
As I say this, a realization comes to me that mommies are blessed with an amazingly short and selective memory. That’s a method God devised to keep them sane! As the child grows older, the memories of fatigue, late nights, aches and pains fade away. And all that a mommy can remember is how angelic the baby was, how bright her smile was or beautiful her voice was.
So here’s a shout out to all the new mommies, take heart. When you are all worn out and the baby is really testing your patience, remind yourself that this too shall pass. And you’ll only have happy memories of these precious years.
Meanwhile, look forward to being known as the mother of your child. That’s one identity you would never want to trade for anything.
Happy Mother’s Day!
I am a doctor with an MD in Clinical Microbiology, working at KEM Hospital, Mumbai. I am a voracious reader, writer and blogger and believe that words can spin magic. I value truth and honesty read more...
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My house-help asked excitedly, “I am going for wedding. Can you let me wear your red & black saree? To be honest I was stumped for a moment; I didn’t know what to say but I still said yes.
I lent a gorgeous saree to my house-help for a wedding in her family. Soon I stated getting questions if I would wear that saree again or if I was okay to be seen wearing the same saree my house-help was wearing?
We are all so conditioned to give our used clothes to our house-helps but are we okay to wear the clothes they were wearing?
A few days ago she came excitedly to me, “I am going for a family wedding. I want to wear your red & black saree, Ill wash and give it to you after the function. Please can you let me wear it?”
Beauty is a very clever, very evil capitalist tool. It traps those who have it into hanging on to it for dear life and those who don't into mutilating, torturing themselves to achieve the unachievable.
I recently wrote a piece about MP Shashi Tharoor’s tweet in which he had shared a pic with six women parliamentarians tagging them and saying “Who says the Lok Sabha isn’t an attractive place to work?”
There was a rash of comments on the post shared on Instagram, which ranged from “chill, it’s just a compliment” and “stop overthinking compliments”, to (worried) men lamenting about “these feminazi”.
Here’s my answer to all those comments.
Kitchen is a known territory. For some it is comfortable too, while not so for others. But do you think it is just ours: Woman's territory?
If the kitchen is a woman’s territory, what does it mean for her ability to venture out beyond it and fulfil her true potential?
Ms. Little Princess (3+ year old girl, curious, quick learner and a keen observer) said, “Mummy! I want a kitchen set. That is only for girls to play. I will grow up and cook food for you and everyone at home. That’s what girls should do, right?”
Ms. Pre-schooler (5 year old girl living in a new age nuclear family) said, “Mummy! Papa made a sandwich for me. But he’s not supposed to enter the kitchen. That is your room, right? You are there all the time.”
Meeting a potential groom and his family for a rishta isn't always an easy experience. But it's downright horrific for some, as these 6 stories prove!
Meeting a potential groom and his family for a rishta isn’t always an easy experience. But it’s downright horrific for some, as these 6 stories prove!
Mumbai matchmaker Sima Taparia’s Indian Matchmaking has blown up to be THE show to watch during lockdown. It is a testament to our ridiculous world of rishtas and the things women have to do to wade through it.
While, marriages may be made in heaven, it is here on earth that women have to go through a lot of hoops to find a partner. Right from their religious beliefs to their education to the clothes they wear, they seem to need to justify everything to their prospective in-laws.