‘Shasya ki Mummy’: My New Identity, And I Love It! #HappyMothersDay

That moment when you gain a new identity as ‘mother of so-and-so’ takes some getting used to. But it is precious too! Do you remember the first time someone referred to you this way?

“Shasya ki mummy”….I turned around to see a mother daughter pair walking towards me repeating the call, “Shasya ki mummy”. Seeing the blank look on my face, the lady enquired, “Aren’t you Shasya’s mother?” I nodded, still looking lost. The lady introduced herself as my daughter’s play school friend and conveyed what she had to. She left, leaving me with my thoughts.

It took me a while to absorb that someone had just referred to me as the mother of my three year old. Till that point my daughter was an extension of me. SHE was known as my daughter and not the other way around. It was odd but lovely in a warm, fuzzy way but it probably needed some getting used to.

This was seven years ago, and this year marks a decade of my motherhood. In all these years, this identity has grown on me and I unabashedly love it. Coming from someone who was big on the individuality thing, this means a lot. And what better day to admit this than on Mother’s Day. It’s my daughter who made me a mother, who made me aware of what it takes to be one. I’m a better person because of her.

From the first time I held her little hand in mine to the time she stroked my hair with those very hands to soothe my hurts, it’s been a great ride. As I take stock of the years, there’s not a single moment that I want to change. From the gurgles and the coos to the sleepless nights and diaper changing, I cannot think of anything I would have be different.

As I say this, a realization comes to me that mommies are blessed with an amazingly short and selective memory. That’s a method God devised to keep them sane! As the child grows older, the memories of fatigue, late nights, aches and pains fade away. And all that a mommy can remember is how angelic the baby was, how bright her smile was or beautiful her voice was.

So here’s a shout out to all the new mommies, take heart. When you are all worn out and the baby is really testing your patience, remind yourself that this too shall pass. And you’ll only have happy memories of these precious years.

Meanwhile, look forward to being known as the mother of your child. That’s one identity you would never want to trade for anything.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Dr Shivani Salil

I am a doctor with an MD in Clinical Microbiology, working at KEM Hospital, Mumbai.

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