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When children mess up things, it can be frustrating for a parent. But should we punish a child, or teach them to learn from the mistakes?
Preeta’s two-year-old son is playing on the dining table while everyone is having lunch. He spills the sambar unknowingly on mama’s new white kurta. Preeta’s immediate reaction is a slap on the little one’s face. Now the question arises, did she do the right thing? Our immediate answer would be, yeah, of course, right, who will tolerate the new kurta being spoilt? If I slap him, he won’t repeat the same mistake.
Now, let us analyze this situation with a cooler mind. Was it the child’s mistake to sit on the table? Who made him sit there? Either mom/dad, right? The child will be shocked by this response from parents. He does not even understand what exactly happened. It will develop a fear in him towards the consequences of unknown mistakes. Are we setting a good foundation for the child? Definitely not.
Also, I am not saying that we should let this incident go without saying anything and just clean up. Instead, we can handle this situation in better ways.
Parents should remember that children should grow fearlessly in the first 5 years of their life. This will set a great strong foundation for their life, that does not mean, we let them do whatever they want in any way, but we should let them commit mistakes and help them to solve them in a peaceful manner. Every mistake committed should become a lesson for them but not a fearful memory.
So, how should we handle the above situation? Preeta can make made a sad face, lift the child and put him down. Tell him it is ok, mistakes happen no need to cry or worry. First thing is she should take his help to clean the mess. Soak the kurta with his help in the water. Advise him to sit always in the highchair instead of the table to avoid such mess. Enjoy the food with the child. Afterwards, sit with him and recap the whole event and ask him next time how he would behave on the table. Also, explain to him that an expensive kurta is spoilt and mama feels bad about it.
Definitely, next time child would think twice to insist to make him sit on the table instead of the highchair. Also, he would hesitate to play with the food vessels on the table!
Children should get assurance from their parents, not the fear.
Published here earlier.
Image source: pixabay
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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