Let This Video Show You How Owning Your ‘Unsexiness’ Is The New Sexy!

The new sexy is about being comfortable in your own skin, not whether you show look pretty and stereotypically 'feminine'. Here's more power to us in all our avatars, sexy or not!

The new sexy is about being comfortable in your own skin, not whether you show look pretty and stereotypically ‘feminine’. Here’s more power to us in all our avatars, sexy or not!

I recently watched a video that was so refreshingly different in its message. The protagonist of the video, Sofia Ashraf, sings that she can’t do sexy but instead of feeling sorry about it, she seems to be celebrating not being sexy! Now, don’t get me wrong – if you think you’re sexy, then hats off to you for such confidence.

But a lot of us suffer from a lack of confidence at times. Like, when she talks about wearing heels and walking like a pregnant platypus or wearing a sari and resembling a truck driver wrapped in a bedsheet.

“When most girls wear a saree

they are hot enough to eat

I’m here looking like a lorry driver

Wrapped in a bedsheet”

Through her hilarious imagery, Sofia shows how we can be totally cool even if we look like a Harry Potter in our glasses or even if we have a mustache or a flat bum.

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This sounded so close to my own experiences too. I recently cut my hair short because of the scorching heat. And though a lot of people said I looked cute, I kind of felt that I looked like a young boy! And yet this video reminded me that no matter how I look, it is more important to feel comfortable in how I choose to carry myself. I was sick and tired of having to manage my thick, long hair and I feel more comfortable now; why do I need to look like a sultry siren all the time?

Why do we feel the need to look good always? Because, we as women have been taught from a very young age that we need to look ‘pretty’, ‘beautiful’, ‘sexy’, that we need to resemble ‘angels’ and ‘princesses’ (thanks Disney!).

So, when you come across this endearing video where women start breaking out into random jigs along with Sofia and show how much fun they’re having while claiming they cannot ‘do sexy’, you know you’ve found your soul sisters!

I’d like to end this piece with of my most favorite quotes on the issue of women and the need to look pretty:

“You don’t owe prettiness to anyone. Not to your boyfriend/spouse/partner, not to your co-workers, especially not to random men on the street. You don’t owe it to your mother, you don’t owe it to your children, you don’t owe it to civilization in general. Prettiness is not a rent you pay for occupying a space marked ‘female’.”

-Erin McKean

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About the Author

Kasturi Patra

Kasturi’s debut novel, forthcoming in early 2021, had won the novel pitch competition by Half Baked Beans Publishers. She won the Runner Up Position in the Orange Flower Awards 2021 for Short Fiction. Her read more...

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