Over the years, your support has made Women’s Web the leading resource for women in India. Now, it is our turn to ask, how can we make this even more useful for you? Please take our short 5 minute questionnaire – your feedback is important to us!
Here are 5 reasons why we drift away in relationships, and also solutions to keep it together.
Why do couples who were once head over heals in love with each other start to drift apart after a few years of being together? There are many reasons and they might vary from couple to couple. If you think about the major ones, they are:
How correctly J.K Rowling has stated two of the main reasons behind many failed relationships. After being together for years, couples start to take each other for granted. Indifference creeps into their relationship and they begin to neglect each other. Not because they dislike each other, but because they are flowing together like leaves floating along in the same river, no more attached to the same tree.
Solution: Try not to neglect each other. Take a genuine interest in each other. He/she was the person whom you thought the world about when you were in love.
Couples these days have no time for each other caught up in their individual careers and lives.There is a huge communication gap.
One expects the other to understand his/her situation because he/she is his/her, spouse/lover. Unfortunately, till this moment human beings do not have the ability to communicate via thoughts or through telepathy.
Solution: You have to talk. When you talk, please do not nag. Telling things more than once, usually do more damage than good.
Try not to bring out his/her past mistakes when you start to argue. Such arguments often tend to escalate beyond your control. When you mention a past mistake you actually hurt yourself again because you start to experience the same emotions which had been created then by that old hurt. Forgive any small mistakes that had happened. She/He had done it because of his/her circumstances then.
Solution: Try to forgive and forget. More than him/her, you will be doing yourself a favour. We human beings are not perfect. We do ourselves more harm when we keep our anger suppressed.
When you are in a public place, you are the most graceful person on earth. You tell “Thank you” to the security guard who opened the supermarket door for you. You say “Sorry” when you accidently bump onto a person on the pavement. But do we remember to say “Thank you” to our spouses for their tiny acts of kindness? Do we openly ask for forgiveness if we make a mistake? Instead, we take their kindness for granted and try to justify our mistakes.
Solution: Practice gratitude. Remember little acts of kindness daily and be grateful for it. Maintain a gratitude journal. Try to be kind yourself. Practice to apologise.
“An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair just about anything.” ― Lynn Johnston
So let us start appreciating, loving and living. Let us bring more magic into our lives by using the magic words “Thank You” and “Sorry.”
Have a great day!
Cover image via Shutterstock
Preethi Venugopala is a Civil Engineer by profession and an artist and writer by passion. Her love for English language manifested into a postgraduate degree in English Literature. She is a published author and her read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Many women have lost their lives to this darkness. It's high time we raise awareness, and make maternal mental health screening a part of the routine check ups.
Trigger Warning: This deals with severe postpartum depression, and may be triggering for survivors.
Motherhood is considered a beautiful blessing. Being able to create a new life is indeed beautiful and divine. We have seen in movies, advertisements, stories, everywhere… where motherhood is glorified and a mother is considered an epitome of tolerance and sacrifice.
But no one talks about the downside of it. No one talks about the emotional changes a woman experiences while giving birth and after it.
Whether it is spunky Lali or wise and profound Baai, overbearing Sui or a gracefully ageing Dilbar, sensitive Saiba or a quietly ambitious Latika, this webseries showcases women characters who are as complex, compassionate and conflicted as real women.
The first short film in the latest Amazon Prime anthology – Modern Love Mumbai( inspired by the much acclaimed Modern love column of New York Times) is titled “Raat Rani” deriving it’s name from the fragrant night-blooming jasmine flower.
*A few spoilers
Director Shonali Bose uses this flower as not just a plot point but also a metaphor for her protagonist Lalzari (a fiesty Fatima Sana Shiekh), a Muslim migrant worker from Kashmir who has eloped with her husband Lutfi to the city of dreams, Mumbai. She works as a cook-cum-nanny and her husband as a watchman in a Mumbai high-rise. After work they spend time with each other gazing at the sea, sharing ice-cream and taking a scooter ride back home, to their kholi, on which they have spent all their earnings.