What actions should HR and business leaders take to curb mental harassment at work? Share your thoughts.
Are Indian women moving abroad happy with their lives or do they wish they could turn back the clock?
“I wish I had held on to my job and deferred moving here post marriage.”
The voice at the other end of the telephone line sounded wistful. I nodded sagely knowing too well that feeling. Even as I wrapped up the call, I was assailed by memories from a decade back. Excitement at getting married. Eagerness to start a new life in a new country. The hope and optimism that pervaded my being. Then the ground reality of trying to find a job in a post 9/11 economy.
I shook my head and went about my routine chores. Words formed and unformed themselves in my head. What were the things I would tell a younger myself now that I had the benefit of having walked those shoes?
1. Hold on to your identity. It could be your job. Your hobbies. Your friends. Anything that defines who you are. Often in the eagerness to mold seamlessly into our partner’s life, we let go of the things that moor us. We find new jobs, make new friends and adopt new hobbies. While it is fun to learn new things and make new friends, hold on to the old ones. They defined you before and will be your anchor as you navigate new waters.
2. Do your homework. If you are moving to a new place or a new country, find out if you can transfer to an office in the new place or work remotely. If that is not possible, give yourself time to find a new job in the new place. Read up on employment regulations, what is possible within the scope of the visa on which you are travelling and what is not. It is easier to figure these out before you move and plan accordingly rather than move and then to work within the constraints.
3. Be mobile. Learn driving if you do not know to drive. If you do, get a driver’s licence and explore the new place. Figure out public transport. Take the bus or train and walk around locally. Get a feel for the place. It helps forge a connection with the place that will be your new home.
4. Make new friends. Library, Cultural associations, Places of worship all give plenty of ways to meet people and connect with those that share a common interest. With new friends comes a new network. Leverage it personally and professionally.
5. Embrace the new. We enter our new lives holding on to expectations and aspirations that stem from a different time in our lives. Sometimes they are met. Most times they are not. Find it in you to unshackle mentally and embrace the new life as is. Without preconditions.
6. Live in the present. It is fun to plan your life around future kids and their needs. The truth is that you live in the present. Do not let what ifs rule your present. Kids may happen or they may not. Planning your life around them effectively robs you of the present as well.
7. This will pass. The tears that fall in a puddle by your feet. That golf ball sized lump of hurt that you swallow. That pain that threatens to overcome you. All of that will pass. You will lose loved ones. There will be times when you feel like you cannot move past the current crisis in your life. All of that, yup, all of that will pass.
Pic credit: Blitho (Used under a Creative Commons license)
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I wanted to scream with excitement that my daughter chose to write about her ambition and aspirations over everything else first. To me, this was one of those parenting 'win' moments.
My daughter turned eight years old in January, and among the various gifts she received from friends and family was an absolutely beautiful personal journal for self-growth. A few days ago, she was exploring the pages when she found a section for writing a letter to her future self. She found this intriguing and began jotting down her thoughts animatedly.
My curiosity piqued and she could sense it immediately. She assured me that she would show me the letter soon, and lo behold, she kept her word.
I glanced at her words, expecting to see a mention of her parents in the first sentence. But, to my utter delight, the first thing she had written about was her AMBITION. Yes, the caps here are intentional because I want to scream with excitement that my daughter chose to write about her ambition and aspirations over everything else first. To me, this was one of those parenting ‘win’ moments.
Uorfi Javed has been making waves through social media, and is often the target of trolls. So who and what exactly is this intriguing young woman?
Uorfi Javed (no relation to Javed Akhtar) is a name that crops up in my news feeds every now and again. It is usually because she got trolled for being in some or other ‘daring’ outfit and then posting those images on social media. If I were asked, I would not be able to name a single other reason why she is famous. I am told that she is an actor but I would have no frankly no clue about her body of work (pun wholly unintended).
So is Urfi Javed (or Uorfi Javed as she prefers) famous only for being famous? How does she impact the cause of feminism by permitting herself to be objectified, trolled, reviled?
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