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On the International Day Of The Girl Child, this beautiful poem charts a girl's journey from being born to becoming an adult!
On the International Day Of The Girl Child, this beautiful poem charts a girl’s journey from being born to becoming an adult!
The hard-hitting poem called ‘A Woman’s Monologue’ has emotional lines such as- ‘I grew up to be my father’s daughter/Very casually, I was given his surname/Why was my father given entitlement for my mother’s labour?’
‘And after so called ‘kanyadaan’/I was going to be my husband’s wife/I would be the one changing names/I would be the one swapping homes.’ Read the full poem below…
It started the day I came
Everyone was happy
But there wasn’t a celebration like the one when my brother was born
I grew up to be my father’s daughter
Very casually, I was given his surname
Now, when I am 18, I wonder
I wonder the reason behind it
Why was my father given entitlement for my mother’s labour?
Why is father’s name on every document mandatory
Then, I had a sudden epiphany
My basic identity was dependent on the males in my life
I was my father’s daughter
And after so called ‘kanyadaan’
I was going to be my husband’s wife
I would be the one changing names
I would be the one swapping homes
And if I dare wish to live separately with my husband
I would be a home-breaker
I am given equal right in property
But I am expected to relinquish it
I am free to work after marriage
Provided the in-laws approve of it
As a woman, it is natural that I be the one to sacrifice
When husband wants sex, it is expected that I oblige
Is marriage a license to rape?
Perhaps that’s why marital rape isn’t criminalised
I am so used to getting less,
That occasional equality makes me cry
I am the one raped, yet I am the one restricted
I am abused, my privacy violated
‘Not all men’, they answer in collective
Its high time you change your perspective
I know it feels uncomfortable
To have less, when all this time you had more
But it’s not just about me,
You know, equality is mutual!
Image source: Still from Nil Battey Sannata
A Law student, content writer, sometimes poet, and an all time reader trying to find solace in literature. read more...
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Stop glorifying biological parenthood - other methods of growing a family are just as valid, and completely a couple's choice, especially of the woman whose body goes through pregnancy and birth.
Stop glorifying biological parenthood – other methods of growing a family are just as valid, and completely a couple’s choice, especially of the woman whose body goes through pregnancy and birth.
Trigger Warning: Contains derogatory remarks about having a baby through surrogacy or any means other than giving birth through biological means, and may be triggering, especially to adoptive parents.
Recently Priyanka Chopra Jonas announced parenthood by surrogacy. This has once again sparked the debate about ethical surrogacy, which is a discussion for another day.
Arathi Rajagopalan, founder of 'House of Kalart', talks about thinking like a designer & transitioning to thinking like a business owner.
Excerpts from an interview with Arathi Rajagopalan, founder of ‘House of Kalart’ – a fusion jewellery label that merges global aesthetics and traditional craftsmanship.
When did you start ‘House of Kalart’ and what was the intention?
I started House of Kalart in 2017 as a venture where painting, drawing and embroidery are married with metalsmithing to create well-handcrafted fashion jewellery. Along with painting and styling, the venture aims to create a holistic fashion experience for a bold and dramatic woman!” As a child, I had always been fascinated by arts and crafts.
Does the change of surname after marriage play into the acceptance of women as now belonging to a new family, with no responsibilities to her natal family?
Does the change of surname post marriage play into the acceptance of women as now belonging to a new family, with no responsibilities to her natal family?
Last November, when I was travelling to Delhi from Nagpur, on my way I met a beautiful family of four in the train. It was a couple who had married early, along with their four year old son and the two year old daughter ‘Gudiya’. The family was going to their hometown in Rajasthan from Chennai, the place where the father used to work as a labourer in a marble factory.
Gudiya was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. Her beautiful big round eyes full of kajal made her look even more beautiful. The kids happily mingled with me and were enjoying my company. On a two day journey to Delhi the kids spent most of their time with me since the time they met me at Nagpur. The parents were happily freed of their continuously annoying kids at least for some time!
And then, ma's words rang in my ears, “Do not ever wait for your destiny to shape itself, my child. Do not tarry, do not wait, do not seek.”
And then, ma’s words rang in my ears, “Do not ever wait for your destiny to shape itself, my child. Do not tarry, do not wait, do not seek.”
“You’re to be married to Arindam next week,” Baba pronounces my fate with a smug smile. “Your astrological charts have matched beautifully, you know?”
I take a rattling breath and struggle to speak with my parched throat. It’s been three days since I’ve been locked up in a dark shed without food or water. “Please,” I whisper. “I don’t want to.”