If you are a professional in an emerging industry, like gaming, data science, cloud computing, digital marketing etc., that has promising career opportunities, this is your chance to be featured in #CareerKiPaathshaala. Fill up this form today!
It took a lot of convincing to get my parents' permission to travel on my own. But once I did, I realised that travelling on my own was wonderful.
It took a lot of convincing to get my parents’ permission to travel on my own. But once I did, I realised that travelling on my own was wonderful.
Travel- the best way to be lost and found at the same time. However, Indian parents don’t let their daughters travel, either alone or with friends.
Recently, before the lockdown began, I went on a trip with my friends. When we planned, it was just a carefree trip but it took a lot of effort to convince them to let me go.
There are a number of things you learn when you travel. It helps you understand the true meaning of life and become a better person. Every time you travel, you see the world with new eyes. And once you’re outside your parents’ safety net, you learn to be more responsible and to take your own decisions. Travelling helps you become more confident.
In our society, travelling is often looked at as a comment on a girl’s character. For me and a lot of my friends, it is unimaginable to even propose a trip, let alone a solo trip! You either don’t trust your daughter or you don’t think she’s mature enough. And you question her confidence and her self-esteem.
Parents wanting their daughters to be safe is fair. The world is not a pretty place for girls. And every parent, is obviously, concerned about their daughter’s safety. However, by not trusting her, you prove to her that she isn’t smart or capable enough to handle the situation.
At the same time, when it comes to her marriage, you expect her to take such a big decision of choosing her partner. Especially in arranged marriages, parents expect their daughter to choose a life partner within a few meets. And if she opts for a love marriage, you don’t trust that choice either.
We like to believe that we keep the birds safe when we don’t set them free. A lot of times, it is the same for the daughters too. Daughters need to be freed too. All our lives we have been told that if we keep travelling we will not be focused enough. But travelling helps us find our purpose and focus in life.
I still remember that time when I travelled with my friends for the first time. It was difficult to convince our parents. They flat out refused initially but we didn’t give up and finally managed to convince them.
However, there were conditions they put on us- ‘Call us every two hours,’ ‘We want numbers of everyone you’re going with.’ They even told us that if we didn’t come back safe or made mistakes, they wouldn’t us travel again. Though we agreed to all their conditions, we know they won’t allow us to travel like that again- not with friends but definitely not solo! All this thanks to the pressure from the society.
There is a quote by Jackson Brown Jr that I like a lot- ‘Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do rather than by the ones you did do.’
So with that quote in mind, let your daughter make their own decisions. Let them listen to their hearts and live their dreams. If they want to fly, let them fly free as a bird. And let your daughter consider you her friend and not her strict parent.
Picture credits: Pexels
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views. Individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times. If you have a complementary or differing point of view, sign up and start sharing your views too!
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
You do not have to be perfect. There’s no perfect daughter, perfect employee, perfect wife, or perfect mother. These are just labels created by society, for their convenience.
So here you are, just out of engineering college, having no clue why you pursued Electronics Engineering. Yes, I know, like many others your age, you too were persuaded by your parents to opt for engineering because it supposedly gets you a lucrative job.
Believe me, however strange this might sound, you’ll soon come to realize that a high paying job need not always make you happy. And there are a myriad courses and career options out there, you should definitely consider something that’ll make you look forward to go to work every day.