Hema Gopinathan

Hema Gopinathan left a blight of a corporate career to homeschool her two children. A teacher trained in the Waldorf/ Rudolf Steiner pedagogy, a writer, an artist, a crocheter, Hema spends half her time in the manic Mumbai waiting impatiently for her teens to fly the coop and the other half in the sylvan Himalayan foothills where she lives the quiet, sustainable life on her farm. She can also be found at youareanothing.com

Voice of Hema Gopinathan

How We Devalue A Woman Who ‘Put Her Career On Hold Over A Husband And Children’

If homemaking is not career enough, then the question that needs asking is why do we only value those things that can be monetarily quantified, and which women were deliberately kept out of for centuries?

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When Some Elite High School Girls In Bangalore Had A Street Fight Over A Boy…!

I imagine what Savitri bai and Fatima Shaikh would be thinking watching this future they sacrificed their lives over, watching young women fight over inconsequential things, and fritter away the precious opportunity of an education.

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Shah Rukh Khan Is The Best Part Of DDLJ, Playing A Cis Het Man Raj With Grace & Humanity

He's very uncomfortable with the boorish, rifle-toting, Patiala-peg swigging alpha male played by Parmeet Sethi or the grumpy sanskaari patriarch Amrish Puri.

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Aparna Shewakramani
Indian Matchmaking: Why Did Aparna Shewakramani Receive So Much Hate, And Even A Death Threat?

Aparna quickly became an extremely polarised personality. Even I who completely identified with her, understood why her existence would shake up the vital pillar of casteism and patriarchy: Arranged Marriage and that made her dangerous.

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With Jhund, Sairaat Fame Nagraj Manjule Has Done It Again With Dalit Protagonists!

While every character, every actor is so fabulous, and this truly is the genius of Manjule, his ability to spot the diamond in the rough, Ankush is special. His eyes speak volumes in the absence of dialogue.

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11y.o. Raped By Brother, Father, Uncle, Grandfather – Why ‘What Was Her Mother Doing’ Is The Wrong Q To Ask!

Is it any stretch of imagination to realise that probably the mother was also being raped by these men? That if she objected, worse could happen to her and the child?

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Kapil Sharma And Revathi Dazzle In 2 Surprisingly Sensitive Mental Health Depictions On OTT

OTT recently threw up two surprisingly sensitive, sincere depictions of mental health. Unexpected in a country that does not know what to do with those suffering from mental illness.

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Since Draupadi, Men Through History Have Put Women On Sale… Which Continues Even Today!

"To create loving men, we must love males…" - bell hooks. Nope. If men want a better world, they need to do better for themselves and each other and their sons and the world at large. It is not the responsibility of women.

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Why Rinku Of Atrangi Re Is A Danger To Real Life Rinkus… And So Shouldn’t Be Idolised

Rinku Sooryavanshi in Atrangi Re is a foul-mouthed, free spirited manic pixie trope of a woman, the Indian cis male idea of an emancipated modern woman. But she is a nothing.

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How An Indian Marriage Crushes Dreams Of Every Woman, Even The Extraordinary, Talented Ones… Like My Mother

Sivaranjiniyum Innum Sila Pengalum (SISP) is an ode to all of the lost women, who could have been sports stars, singers, bankers, lawyers, doctors, just... happy, if they hadn't been enslaved in matrimony, and then forgotten all about.

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My Answer To Those Who Commented On My Earlier Post Telling Me Not To “Overthink Compliments”

Beauty is a very clever, very evil capitalist tool. It traps those who have it into hanging on to it for dear life and those who don't into mutilating, torturing themselves to achieve the unachievable.

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Dear Cis Het Man Tharoor, Would You ‘Compliment’ Male Colleagues Like You Did Your Female Ones?

It's not wrong to be nice, just be nice to everyone equally. If you are complimenting female colleagues only, on their looks, then you are not treating her as a professional, as any other colleague, but as a woman.

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Why Men Never Notice Any Chores That Need To Be Done And Women ‘Take Longer To Get Ready’

I looked at my watch. I had taken 15 mins to get ready, including hair wash and make up and clothes. By the time my friends got ready and we all could leave, it was 9pm. We reached the venue at 10pm.

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Paanta Bhat
How Masterchef Finalist Kishwar Chowdhury’s Panta Bhaat Exposed My Late Mother’s Shameful Secret

When Kishwar Chowdhury made panta bhaat as haute cuisine at Masterchef this year, she exposed that tiny, slightly shameful secret of my mother's, fermented leftover rice that no one else would touch, and my heart broke slightly.

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14 Men Raped A 13y.o In Pune Over 5 Days. Yes, Read Those Numbers, And Then Read Ahead!

Rape and sexual violence are power tools, they have little or nothing to do with desire or lust and everything to do exercising power over those can be dominated.

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Do You Feel Attacked When We’re Speaking Of Our Trauma? You’re Probably Part Of The Problem

Whataboutery has no place in a fight for equitable rights. First listen to what is being said instead of jumping in with assumptions if you consider yourself feminist.

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Surekha Sikri And Zohra Sehgal Proved That A Woman’s Beauty Has Nothing To Do With Age

Surekha Sikri is proof that age has nothing to do with beauty, so why are so many people sharing her 'youthful' picture while expressing their grief?

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Film Sara’s Shows Indian Men How To Be True Partners To Women Or Get Out Of The Way

While the new Malayalam film Sara's is primarily about a woman’s right to abortion, the film centralises a woman’s ambition and even attempts to normalise it.

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Mandira Bedi
Mandira’s Decision To Do Husband’s Last Rites Is Inspiring, But Did Anything Truly Change?

Mandira exercised her right to send off her partner the way she chose, and has inspired many; but will it intrinsically change anything in brahminical patriarchal?

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Ghar 1978
Rekha’s Ghar (1978) Dares To Question The Safety Of A Sanskaari ‘Good’ Wife From Rape

This is what makes Ghar such a surprising film, that it questions the safety of a person who is considered the most secure and protected by virtue of being a good woman, married to a good man.

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Vismaya murder
Pull Up Your Sons; We’ve Had One Vismaya Too Many Killed For Your Entitlement

Let's hold accountable the husbands and in-laws who callously murder women when dissatisfied with the dowry, and parents who raise daughters to be 'good wives and daughters in law'.

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career at 48
Starting A Career At 48 Doesn’t Mean I’ve Been Idle All These Years!

I have been a homemaker all my life, but I don't remember a time I didn't write or paint or study. So I've honed my skills over a lifetime.

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Cars24 ad
The Wild, Unbridled Laughter Of Women, For Which They Are Usually Shamed

There's a new Cars24 ad, that has elements appealing to feminists everywhere; especially the free, wild, unbridled laughter of women.

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Saudagar 1973: Men Exploit Women’s Work & Bodies As Mere Currency To Benefit Themselves

Saudagar (1973), the Nutan-Amitabh-Padma Khanna starrer shows how women's work is not just invisibilised, but also how it is used by men to uphold patriarchy to benefit themselves.

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Does The Chudail From Roohi Give Us A Feminist Fix For Our ‘Bad’, Unsanskaari Women?

So much of patriarchy is about controlling women, their behaviour, their bodies, their choices. A Chudail, or as in Roohi, a Mudiyapairi, is the way Hindi films often deal with this.

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The Adarsh Girlfriend Of Maine Pyar Kiya v/s The DIL From The Great Indian Kitchen

Can the unnamed but spunky heroine of The Great Indian Kitchen help to finally put away all the adarsh naaris on the Indian screen, like Suman from Maine Pyar Kiya?

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Hon. Mumbai HC Judge, If ‘Only Skin On Skin Contact’ Is Sexual Assault, What Do You Call These?

Mumbai HC judge Pushpa Ganediwala rules that "mere groping is not sexual assault, unless it is skin on skin contact", setting back the struggles to define sexual violence against children.

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sir is love enough is sexual harassment
SIR, Is Love Enough: Sexual Harassment At Work Packaged As A ‘Sweet Love Story’?

By glorifying the sexual harassment the female protagonist faces in the film Sir, Is Love Enough, we've made life more unsafe for domestic workers. Just note the power differential. 

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The Great Indian Kitchen
Malayalam Film The Great Indian Kitchen Is All About Homegrown Sexism With A Twist

The Great Indian Kitchen. A movie that can only be made by a Malayali director, who takes on patriarchy and religion, with such gumption.

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No Woman Farmer From Punjab Could Be ‘Kept’ In The Protests Without Her Consent

Women farmers, especially from the farming communities of Punjab who are in the protest, cannot be 'kept' anywhere without their consent.

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Arundhati Maitreyi scheme
Are You Criticising Karnataka Govt’s Provision For Poor Brahmin Brides? Tsk, Tsk!

Karnataka State Government to provide 'bride price' for poor Brahmin brides with Arundhati & Maitreyi schemes, but with a few caveats that make us wonder.

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‘Housewives’ Shouldn’t Expect Payment For ‘Labour Of Love’ – Really?

Kangana Ranaut yet again puts her foot in her mouth by taking on those she calls 'housewives', dictating that they do all unpaid labour just for 'love'.

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Do ‘Feminist Films’ Like Queen’s Gambit And Bulbbul Have To Show Extreme Violence?

Why do we need to use tropes of mental illness, addiction, violence that breaks a woman, to show her as a strong character that then 'rises' from these ashes to avenge herself?

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kitchen politics
Patriarchy Makes The Kitchen A Battlefield For Women, But I Have Hope For Our Daughters…And Sons

The kitchen is made to be the battleground where women are pitted against each other, by a patriarchy that benefits from it. Time for a change?

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It’s Hard To Be Aparna In A World Where Sima Aunty Says Exactly What Sanskaari Indians Think

Indian Matchmaking. Made me wonder if we have progressed at all since Independence, in our attitude towards women, their education, and their place in society.

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The Way My MIL & I Differed On How To Use The Pressure Cooker Was A Lesson In More Than Cooking

The whole point of pressure cooking was to keep the pressure in and not release it multiple times thereby wasting time and fuel. But...

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