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When a woman does not fit into the 'beauty standards' set by society, why do we focus on the extra few pounds instead of understanding the struggles she goes through, and reduce her to just her body?
Not all women feel confident about their body weight and the curves that come with it. On one hand, you can find some women happy with their curves, accepting them as a part of their bodies. On the other hand, some women might even want to cut the extra flesh off from their bodies because it comes with the tag “extra”- that extra pound, an extra inch, and so on!
Don’t you all think that curves are beautiful? I feel that chubbiness is gorgeous too.
Our typical idea of an attractive body type is a perfectly “slim” one. However, in a world filled with fitness freaks and slim beauties, we must normalize showing off our not-so-thin arms through unruffled sleeves. Appreciate the big thighs, the bloated stomachs, and double chins, an “imperfect” shape altogether. It is and always will be immensely attractive, making anyone fall for you. Women must display confidence and maturity no matter how their bodies are built.
Our society has set some useless criteria for a woman’s body. A slim girl is considered “normal”, and people praise her for her fitness. But the same people reduce a “chubby” woman to just that – her body! She isn’t noticed for the person she is but instead made to feel odd about her own body. She is made to feel insignificant about herself.
Overweight women always feel bullied and ridiculed. They feel vulnerable because, out of nowhere, on any occasion and at any place, ‘the bothering aunty’ can fire a bullet with the question – “Are you gaining weight?”!
A barrage of advice follows.
..the list is never-ending!
I have not been able to understand even today, how when women reach ‘marriageable’ age, they are asked to focus on their weight while this rule does not apply to men!
Parents start having nightmares about their overweight daughter and that she might get rejected in the ‘marriage market’. The same people who dare to reject a woman because of her weight then ask her to put on a few pounds just after she gets married, so that she can conceive a child. The same advice follows when she is pregnant so she may deliver ‘normally’.
Curves are not always a result of overeating or an undisciplined lifestyle. For many women, the burden of balancing their career and personal lives is very high, leaving them little time to maintain a ‘barbie doll’ figure. And the stress adds to it all.
How can she even dream of having enough time to hit the gym to get that ‘beach body’?
Societal norms dictate that a mother or even a pregnant woman loses the right to wear her favourite clothes to feel sexy – she now only has loose clothes to choose. Else she is judged heavily for ‘prancing around’ with a baby bump.
When a woman gives birth to a new life, her own priorities, appetite, body, and sanity go for a toss. As she goes about fulfilling her motherly duties, she often does not get to wear her favourite dress. She might have spent hours shopping for it so she can look gorgeous. She may have wanted to sparkle in her new and perfect attire but often cannot do so due to her insecurities.
Behind a woman’s tears, there may be hormonal changes, PMS, and so many other health issues – but she still balances both her family and her career.
Give credit to her stretch marks – it’s a sign of procreation.
Give applause to her dark circles – it’s a sign of her hard work.
Give kisses to the wrinkles around her eyes – they are a sign of the care she shows to the people around her.
Give her what she deserves.
Don’t reduce her to her curves – see her for the gorgeous woman she is.
Image source: a still from the film Dum Laga Ke Haisha
Neelu Mahto holds a Master's degree in Commerce and a Bachelor's degree in Education. She is pursuing her career as a Salesforce developer in the IT sector. She believes that whatever we feel, read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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