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New moms often have to tackle ample questions which invades their privacy. Here are some questions that shouldn't be asked!
Right after giving birth, everything changes for a woman. She has just delved into something completely new, something she has zero experience in. Her mind is undergoing a whirlwind of emotions. There is a tiny brand new person who is dependent on her for everything. She might not be too sure of what she is doing. It’s natural, of course! She is still trying to figure things out.
Sounds tough enough, right? Yet, why are some people hell-bent on invading their personal space when they are so vulnerable? They ask questions that should not be asked. Few of these queries are downright offensive and the rest simply don’t make any sense. Wondering what I am talking about?
Did you have a normal delivery or C-section?
Does it matter? Why don’t you first ask if the mom and the baby are well? As long as a woman is sure of what she ( and the gynaecologist) are doing, she can do whatever she wants to.
When are you planning for the next one?
When someone asks this question to me, what I say out loud is – “not thinking about it right now!” In my mind, I wish I had superman’s ability to shoot laser beams from my eyes.
Why are you still working?
The answer to this question is simple- because I want to! If someone feels the need to take a break after becoming a mother, they certainly have the right to do so. You don’t get to decide what works for me. So ‘Thank You, Next!
Does your husband help you out with the baby?
Of course, he does. Guess what? This is the 21st century where you and your partner are supposed to divide the responsibilities equally. That’s how modern marriages work. It’s not just a woman who has to do it all. Do you say I am lucky? Yes, I am lucky! But so is my husband, to have found me!
You are a mother now. Your needs are secondary.
Seriously? I highly doubt that. If I am not happy, it will directly impact the baby too. How am I supposed to raise a baby if I feel my needs don’t matter? So as a mom, I am as primary and important as the baby is!
Before you start disdaining my concerns with kuch to log kahenge, logo ka kaam hai kehna (People will say, it is their job to say things), here are a few cents from a new mother to all the ‘well-wishers’ out there-
Follow these aforementioned rules to the T while visiting a new mother and you are golden! She won’t talk smack about you, once you leave!
What do you say, new mommies?
Image Source: Still from Pexels
Gangotri is a versatile writer and editor with a Master's degree in Economics. Alongside her literary pursuits, she has also cultivated a love for cooking, experimenting with flavors and techniques in the kitchen. She read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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