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"I'm a mum and a..."? Too often, we forget that mums play many other roles too. This exhibition is all about being mum and everything else.
So when Aparna mailed me about this Story of Mum series, and asked to write, I jumped. It was such a cool collection of all the wonderful hats that moms all around the globe wore. They may struggle, flourish, curse, glow in the duties and happiness that comes with working through responsibilities of being a mom, but do they do. ..and even enjoy telling a tale or two along the way.
As I looked through various mommy blogs and pictures and descriptions of how each mom looked at themselves, I realized we were all dreamers and chasers (of our dreams). Goals included, but we must first dream and hope to act on the dream for it to become a goal and then one day reach it. That’s pretty much the one commonality that every mom-woman shares. Not that others don’t have goals or dreams, but it seemed like being a mom just made you crave and want to dream and achieve that goal with just a little more determination. I suppose it could partly be due to the fact that “time” is of essence and doing something, anything for one’s own self becomes that much more precious.
..coz well, we are all on a journey. On this long train ride through life and we meet people who hop on and hop off at various stations of our journey, and who leave us just a bit changed. Each experience in raising a child, learning how to, and in the process growing but never stopping – it is a journey. One that we cannot stop even if we want to, because that is how a relationship works. Even with our own selves.
I am a mum and …am also a child.
..coz as much as I am a mother, am a child in a few ways.
Mothers are supposed to know it all (at least most of whatever they need to know coz they are adults) and a child is supposed to learn from the adult.
However, with time, I have realized that the child is indeed the father of the man. A child teaches in his/her own innocent manner the value of priority, sacrifice, patience, responsibility and courage even.
When the child screams for a diaper change in the middle of an important call with work, you excuse yourself and go change that diaper. The teenager’s college expense is more important than the holiday that you have been dreaming of since you were a teenager. To wait your time for them to grow up and be independent so you can pick up the pieces of your life and start to tend your dreams is patience. Responsibility is waking up at 5:30 am (after just 4 hours of sleep after work, and assignments at that part-time degree you were working on) to pack lunches and make sure the shoes are on top of the vent, so they are warm and toasty when they step out into sub-zero temperatures to school. To jump into cold water is and learn how to swim as an adult is courageous just so you can take your child to that water park and he/she insists that you go along to the deep end.
There is more, but yes, am a child, forever learning, dreaming, imagining, laughing and living life sometimes as a mom, and sometimes as a child.
Sometimes I confuse myself, but thank heavens my three children will always remind me. They got my back alright.
Rads lives in the suburbs of Washington DC along with her husband, three kids and dog. Profiled on Her Story, she is an optometrist and a data analyst in previous years, and is now playing read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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