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"What to do after 12th boards?" is the dilemma of every child who has given this exam. All you need is the courage of your convictions.
My cousin, who is eight years younger than me, is giving her board exams this year, and I recently visited her. She was in a dilemma – what to do after 12th boards?
Before I delve into the incident I want to share, let me give a short introduction.
My cousin is very dear to me, and I was the one who taught her how to walk when she was 3-4 years old. I was sometimes given the responsibility of taking care of her. She is really smart and intelligent and always comes out on top in her class. She’s also the head girl of her school and has moderated many events. All this at such a young age of 16-17.
Everything seems flawless from the outside, but the truth is that she is often overwhelmed with all the responsibilities she has, which makes it hard for her to prioritize things, leading to outbursts on her parents.
When I recently visited her and asked how she was doing and what she was thinking of doing after the board exams, she casually said that “I was relying on bhaiya (cousin/tuition teacher) to tell me what to do.” Then she told me that it becomes really overwhelming to know that there are so many options to choose from.
But I believe the underlying issue is that she knows she has the potential to excel in whatever field she chooses, which makes it more difficult for her to make a choice. She might be thinking, “What if I choose one thing but later, I don’t like it?” She also mentioned our parents and how they dedicated their lives to one profession. Her dad was in the army and had always been in a job, while my dad has a business and never changed his field.
I felt that she feared making a choice about her career that would stick with her for her lifetime.
When I heard all this, I made it clear to her that we don’t have to stick to whatever choice we make in such early phases of our lives. What we need to focus on is our interests and follow them. I also told her that, unlike our parents, we live in a technologically advanced era, which forces us to change as per the times.
It’s highly unlikely that we will live the same fate as our parents. I believe we have the chance and the choice to change our careers if we want to and we’re not forced to stick with one job for our whole life.
I also made it clear that whatever she chooses, I’ll be there to support her, and even if after some time, she thinks she made a mistake, I’ll be there to guide her. What’s more important is to have the courage to choose for oneself without anyone else’s interference. I believe if she becomes dependent and looks for another person to choose for her, then she’ll never be fully independent and will always be in a state of confusion when it comes to making decisions.
Image source: Sofia Alejandra on pexels
I am Ekta Sati, born & brought up in a very peaceful and beautiful city, Rishikesh. I am an admirer of nature and loves to spend my time on the riverside and in the forests. read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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