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Ranbir Gives Himself A Good Husband/Dad Certificate After His Gaffes – And Doing The Bare Minimum?!

In what felt like an image whitewashing exercise for Ranbir by his cousin Kareena, camoflaged as a promo for his new film, he speaks of how good a husband and dad he is.

A recent interview Ranbir Kapoor did with his cousin Kareena Kapoor appeared to be a film promo, but maybe it was also a bid to fix Ranbir Kapoor’s image? Something to help restore his cache as progressive?

Considering that he is a millennial, Ranbir Kapoor seems to have more than his fair share of uncle energy about him. He recently called his wife ‘too loud’, appeared to mock her pregnancy weight gain – not his only uncle-worthy comments to women actors. Here’s what happened

The good dad – kal, aaj, kal (reference to old Kapoor Khandaan film wholly on purpose)

We hear a lot about family values being important to Ranbir Kapoor and to his father Rishi and other older men in his family, while simultaneously hearing how his father was ‘distant’. So apparently his father wasn’t so much a friend to him but family values are very important. It sounded a little mixed up to me, but what do I know – I’m just some opinionated feminist.

He says he has changed a diaper, but doesn’t sound too sure about it. He is a ‘master in burping’ who can make his daughter burp in 20 seconds. He became a light sleeper. He kept checking if his daughter was breathing during those first months (I can identify; I did the same as a new mother). Now based on all this, the man has given himself the tag of a good father.

Also, a good husband

He took time off before the baby was due, he spent a week in hospital, and he was there for the birth. For all this, he gives himself the ‘Good Husband’ certificate, adding that his wife Alia may disagree (maybe listen, then?). The gushing cousin chimes in to express her approval/amazement at the ‘good husband-ing’, because apparently her husband didn’t spend a day in hospital.

All round nice guy

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Kareena Kapoor is hard at work presenting Ranbir Kapoor – her cousin and the guy promoting his film (surprise! surprise!) – as this all-round nice guy. He makes the right noises about equal pay for male and female actors (I wonder if his female costars are paid the same and if not, whether he reimburses the difference from his own pay).

He makes the politically correct noises about fair skin and confidence – though any fair-skinned person in India knows that this unearned privilege helps a lot. He also speaks about how the family background of actors do not matter since all the top stars are ‘outsiders’ (a patent untruth). He also says that it doesn’t matter when women actors are taller than male actors (conveniently skipping over heeled shoes, clever camera angles, etc.) he also speaks about how daal-chawal is best… sigh! Yes, again!

So here’s the problem (yes there is, can’t choke that pesky feminist off!). Firstly, there is the fact that our man is giving himself ‘good husband’ and ‘good dad’ certificates. Secondly, the bar is set so very low! Men are lauded for doing the bare minimum as fathers and partners.

They say things like this

Famed transphobe who self describes as ‘theocratic fascist’ said this about his experience as a father-to-be at hospital. Now this guy is a well-known provocateur and he literally makes a living out of getting a rise out of people by making infuriating statements. He is clearly just saying this for effect.

Image source

However, Matt Walsh is actually responding to a now-deleted tweet from right wing author and host Jesse Kelly that said: what was the hardest thing for YOU about your wife’s pregnancy?” This guy wanted to know all about the “painful experiences of men” waiting in hospitals for women they impregnated to bring for their offspring. When Walsh replied with that egregious tweet embedded above, the man was clueless enough to reply thusly: same for me. Here’s your “couch”. I want a couch. It was a loveseat. Why can’t I have a bed? SHE has a bed.

A lot of men do still make it all about themselves… even as a woman undergoes unimaginable (for them) pain, and the body and life-altering event called childbirth. So when Ranbir Kapoor chose to be with wife Alia when she gave birth, that doesn’t make him a good parent and spouse. That is just the bare minimum – guys, don’t go giving yourself certificates just yet.

Interview images and header image source YouTube

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About the Author

Reena Daruwalla

A former lawyer, now freelance writer, fauji wife, mother, singer, knitter and lover of my own cooking, I have altogether too many opinions and too few convictions. The more I learn the more I am read more...

36 Posts | 12,087 Views

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