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I got married this year, and we were having some conversation regarding my expectations, she said, “Didi I don’t have expectations, I have requirements”. I didn’t relate to it at first, but when she explained it to me, I was blown away with her words.
I met my cousin lately and yet again she said something which was really thought-provoking.
A lot of you related to the blog, Didi, My Generation Wants Sex But They Don’t Really Understand Intimacy!, and the inspiration behind this blog was my cousin. In the last blog, I wrote that our generations don’t have that much gap, but now I think we do.
Since I got married this year, and we were having some conversation regarding my expectations, she said, “Didi I don’t have expectations, I have requirements”. I didn’t relate to it at first, but when she explained it to me, I was blown away with her words.
“An expectation is something hoped for, whereas a requirement is something that is demanded, something that is necessary.”
Please read the above quoted sentence twice.
I remember when I was meeting men (the matches) for marriage, everyone asked me what are your expectations, but nobody asked me my requirements.
When expectations are being conveyed, you are indirectly making the other person the decision maker. I mean, it’s okay if he/she fulfils your expectations or not, irrespective of the fact how important they are to you.
My cousin told me the time has come where girls don’t have expectations, but requirements.
She, herself, told me, “I am very clear what I require from my partner and the same will be conveyed to him. I don’t want him to take me for granted.”
I mean, think to yourself, whenever we say I expect you to take me out, we aren’t giving him the option?
Whenever I have a dialogue with my cousin, I feel elated to acknowledge the thinking process of girls today. They know their value, and they are not ready to compromise by degrading it.
Once again I would request to read the difference between expectations and requirements, and judge yourself is it necessary to convey your requirements or not?
Image Source: Still from trailer of Baadhai Ho, edited of Canva Pro
Smriti Malhotra is a Delhi girl and an avid dreamer. She works at the Embassy of the Republic of Congo by profession but is a writer by passion. She began writing while at school and read more...
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