To Have Those Men Leching At Me….I Was Filled With Revulsion!

Aren’t these very men taught to 'behave decently' with their female relatives? Then can't they put that to use and leave strangers alone?!

Try however hard I might, that horrific incident is still vivid in my memory. It was almost forty years ago. I was thirteen then, and we lived in a nondescript town in Haryana.

On that particular day my dad had taken me to a gynaecologist for a check up (I was facing hormonal imbalance).

It was evening when we left the clinic. The streets were poorly lit. As we hailed a rickshaw, my sixth sense told me that and something bad would happen and I was right!

The rickshaw puller had deliberately dislodged the metal chain connecting the two wheels. Each time he went to the rear of the vehicle to fix it, he grabbed my waist roughly, his face contorting into an evil grin. I squirmed and moved away from his grubby hands as best as I could. The chap acted so quietly that my father who sat beside me all along had no inkling of the goings-on.

Observing how I was fidgeting, my father asked me to sit still. I was too dazed to tell him the truth. I heaved a sigh of relief when we finally reached home. That night I took my mom aside and narrated what had happened. She hugged me tight, telling me that I must exercise abundant caution if such a situation recurred, in future. In retrospect, I could have told Dad while the nefarious deed was underway. But I don’t know why I was tongue tied.

It happened to me; it could happen to anyone…

Several years later, yet another horrifying experience came my way. And that too in broad daylight. I was 18 by then, and we had relocated to Kanpur, U.P.

One day after lunching at a dhaba as I was walking home with my mother and brother, a guy on a bicycle slowly crept up to the side of the road I was on.

He inched close beside me, pinched my bosom and then pedalled merrily away, as if nothing had happened. I was insane with rage and all I could do was shout some profanities while he was within earshot. It was not just the pain or shock of the act; it was a sense of shame, violation, abuse and helplessness that overpowered me.

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This is not an isolated incident. It happened to me. It could happen to you. Or the girl next door. Who knows. It is the depravity of men which I find loathsome. Aren’t these very men taught to behave decently with their female relatives and kinsfolk? Well, if they manage to adhere to that moral code in certain controlled situations, why can’t they leave strangers (women unfamiliar to them) in peace as well?

Image for representation. Source: a still from the film Badrinath ki Dulhania

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About the Author


Am a trained and experienced features writer with 25 plus years of experience .My favourite subjects are women's issues, food travel, art,culture ,literature et all.Am a true feminist at heart. An iconoclast read more...

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