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If A Friend Always Had Your Back, Would You Still Need Validation From Others?

Have you ever come across posts where stray dogs are rescued and there are before and after pics? It's amazing to see the transformation that a little love and care brings about in them. The same applies to humans.

What if I told you I loved you and would hold your back forever, no matter what? How brave would you feel? Won’t you be infused with a confidence that would make you want to take in the world, be the best version of yourself that you can be? Love. Love is an energy, the presence of which makes miracles possible. What are miracles anyway? A possibility that has not been tapped into for fear. Fear of judgement, failure, disappointment.

Have you ever come across posts where stray dogs are rescued? These posts are often accompanied with pictures of a before and after shot of the animal. Many a times I have been amazed to see the transformation that a little love and care brings about in an animal. The same applies to humans. But given that we are hardwired to think that we are a superior race, we believe that we are above love.

Why did FRIENDS touch a chord with so many people?

Life as an adult is very taxing. Especially if you are juggling various roles of being yourself. I have many a times felt very bogged down by people, situations or sometimes by work. But no matter how bogged down I felt, just sitting with a mug of coffee and watching the TV series FRIENDS, infused me always with the much needed energy to brighten my mood.

What is it about the series, I wondered that created such magic? Much to my surprise I realised that it’s the presence of love, warmth and acceptance. FRIENDS as we all know is all about ‘friends who are family’. It’s about people who are not perfect but are still immensely loved and accepted. It’s about being so painfully human and flawed yet always having someone to hold your back no matter what and seeing the best in you. Most importantly, it’s about having a home where you are forever loved and welcomed. Sadly, it’s utopic. It’s a make believe.

We live in a world where judgements rather than understanding run amok. Everywhere one sees, one can see products, behaviour, possessions that can make one more lovable. What’s wrong with being who we actually are I wonder?

This contemplation throws us in an abyss of emotional insecurity. And when we are ourselves insecure about receiving love, how do we expect love to even show up? What do you see when you look at yourself, the kind of person you are, the life that you have created? What do you see when you see you. The raw You?

Do you see lack, do you see that you are not good enough, do you see that emotional insecurity dictating your self image? If yes, it means you have given the power to be loved to someone else. No matter what the world tells you, the fact remains that just because you are you, you deserve love. In your best and in your worst. Because love does not choose. Just like the sun does not shine a little brighter on someone who’s done BOTOX.

What if I could always have my back?

While watching Friends, just like that one day I realised, what if I become the person who will always love me and hold my back no matter what rather than abandoning myself for a stranger’s validation? Where would it lead me? It will lead me to freedom, freedom from requiring to be validated by people who has differing opinions. It will lead me to people who really loves me because I am and will continue to do so, just because I am me. It will lead me to my own utopia, albeit an existing one.

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So if you have the choice to create a life powered by love, will you start by loving yourself first, like you deserve, or will you give your power away to the others who would try to love everything about you, except the real You? Next time you see yourself doubting your value, just remember to take back your power. The choice is yours.

Who would you give your power to?

Image source: a still from the film Cocktail

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About the Author

Priyanka Kotoky

A Social Media Content Writer by profession. A writer by heart. A genuine foodie. Simple by nature. Love to read, create paintings and cook. Have impossible dreams. At the moment, engaged in making those dreams read more...

85 Posts | 145,416 Views

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