Wah! A Woman Quietly Suffering Domestic Abuse Is Good, But A Woman Who Fights Back Is Characterless?!

So it is ok for the girl to suffer at the hands of her husband, but her family shouldn't help, fearing what will SOCIETY say?

Trigger Warning: This deals with domestic violence and parental neglect, and may be triggering for survivors.

Why is it that even today, in the 21st century, crime against women is still high? Why is it that even today a woman suffering domestic violence is considered good, but a woman who fights back is called characterless?

What will society say?

Two years ago I had met this woman. She had a toddler and was staying with her parents because she could no longer live with her drunkard husband, who didn’t have a job and would also take her money, leaving her sometimes with no money even to feed her baby.

She had come to live with her parents hoping that they would help her, but they gave in to the so-called society’s demands and begged her to return to him. They did send a lot of stuff along with her to appease her husband and in-laws.

Six months back she gave birth to a baby boy. Her family was happy that now her life would be better, after all she had given birth to the family heir. When her parents went to meet her, they saw that she had lost weight, and had given birth to a sickly baby due to lack of nutrition during the pregnancy. Her parents begged her husband and in-laws for permission to let them take her with them for a few months, but were not ‘granted’ that and returned home empty-handed.

I haven’t heard about her after that. Last month I saw her mother and asked her why were they so scared to bring her with them, and her answer was, “What will the society say, married daughter in her maternal home?”

So it is ok for the girl to suffer at the hands of her husband, but her family shouldn’t help, fearing what will SOCIETY say?

Now to my story

After finding out that my husband had been cheating on me and had possibly fathered a child with a married woman – mind you this woman was married to ‘his friend’ – I was devastated. I was also pregnant at this time and unfortunately ended up losing my baby.

Never miss real stories from India's women.

Register Now

My parents took me away from that man and his family and helped me cope up with the loss of my baby and also my health; I had to undergo a cesarean to deliver my baby. The so-called society has been telling me to move in back with my husband and plan another baby, after all he is a man, it’s okay if he does it.

That man hasn’t once tried to check if I survived the surgery or not, though he was angry when I stopped paying the money he and his mother took from me every month to live in his house. I and my parents have been threatened by him and his family that if I do not start paying him again he will destroy my life. Well, unluckily for him 5 years of marriage with him have made me stronger than what I was, and luckily I have supportive parents. Yes they are worried about the society but they don’t want to lose me.

So today I want to ask a question. Is a dead daughter better than going against the so-called society? After seeing this I feel that people who commit female infanticide are better than these jerks, at least they ensure that the girl won’t survive to suffer at the hands of so many others. It’s just my opinion though; I just wish that God just stops making human females, there is no need for such a society to survive, their extinction would be for the best!

Image source: Still from Marriage Short Film WOMEN EMPOWERMENT, Content Ka Keeda via YouTube 

Liked this post?

Join the 100000 women at Women's Web who get our weekly mailer and never miss out on our events, contests & best reads - you can also start sharing your own ideas and experiences with thousands of other women here!

Comments

About the Author

52 Posts | 277,620 Views

Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!

All Categories