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I am a working mom, working from home, of a 2-year-old toddler. One word that defines me is “exhausted”, mentally, emotionally, and physically.
Motherhood is more difficult than math, it has no logic, no formula, no theorem. You solve one problem, and a new, a completely different kind arises the next second!
Motherhood is portrayed as fairy tale, but after 2 years I have realized it’s not so. I keep asking my, more experienced counterparts when it gets easy, “It never gets better, you get” someone whom I fondly call my babypedia told me once. Now finally, after sleepless nights, tantrum sessions, multiple meltdowns, over-exhaustion, nights of back pains and night feeding, public display of whining and wailing, I have finally accepted that it never gets better, in fact, it gets more difficult every day.
I am still reminiscent of my days before I was a mother. It was my life, my dreams, my career, my priorities. It has all changed now. Some days I feel joy, some days frustration, some days bliss, and other days anxiety. Most days I feel all of it at the same time. It never looked that difficult from far, so I started asking if I am overreacting or being overanxious like everyone around me says. It turns out it’s part of the job. And to make things more difficult, I have what they call is a “spirited child”. Only 1 out of 10 children are spirited, a fancy word for the most notorious, ‘get down the fridge right now’ kind of kid.
And there is always a perfect kid around the corner, who is a no-fuss child, eats well, sleeps well, smiles always. And then you look at you’re lying on the ground, wailing child because she wanted the spider to dance, and it isn’t.
I have come to realize that motherhood is the toughest job with the most overbearing and demanding boss. And the work from home, that many claims is a blessing, is not a blessing at all. Imagine trying to attend a leadership call, while your child is playing with her own potty. Yes, it happens.
It’s more difficult than mathematics, it has no logic, no formula, no theorem. You solve one problem, and new, a completely different kind arises the next second. And sometimes you have multiple problems all with the different requirements at the same time.
But when your toddler finally sleeps, you see an angel and not the monster you dealt with all day long and you fall in love all over again. It’s going to be more difficult the next day, but you have a tiny bit of more experience and wisdom now and you sleep, because you want to, if you can. It might be 2 hrs., 4 hrs. or if you are lucky then maybe even 6 hrs.
Welcome to motherhood!
Image source: Still from Secret Superstar
Experimenting with experiences is the mantra of my life. Writing is a passion that helps me channel my emotions and recreate memories, publish points of view and create stories. A self-proclaimed creative soul, I read more...
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