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The world out there is cruel and sometimes it can make us cruel. But I want you to be kind. I want you to grow up to be a compassionate human being!
My little one you, are growing up so fast and the world is changing so quickly. I cherish you and I love you, but I’m also scared for you. Your world is so beautiful, it is full of dreams imagination, and love. But this is a bubble that we have created for you, and one day you will grow out of this bubble. Sadly, the world out there is not so kind, it is full of challenges, and I know you can handle challenges.
Look at you, you are already so opinionated and stubborn, and you get your way, always. I’m not worried about the challenges; I’m worried about the people who are not so empathetic and who will not be thoughtful or considerate to you. But I want you to be kind. I want you to grow up to be a compassionate human being. Yes, you should be ambitious, you should be a go-getter, you should be determined, and you should be demanding but not at the expense of someone else. In this world where everyone is chasing their dreams, they often break other people’s trust.
But the world is cruel, especially for the fairer gender. You will surely have your own set of battles and difficulties.
I hope you will not have to answer people about your choice of wardrobe, or what career you want to take up, when or if you want to get married, or if you want to have kids or not. I hope you will not be asked to adjust your aspirations or cover yourself up. I hope you don’t have to carry a pepper spray or watch over your back at night. I hope you don’t have to cover your tampons packets or think twice about taking night shifts. I hope, yes, and I know, it will be better, just like it was better for us than our mothers and aunts.
Dear daughter, the world is a better place, even if so a little bit, because of the generations of women who have stood up, and put their foot down, who were brave to defy the toxic norms and who were helpful and encouraging other women. So don’t take what you have for granted. Yes, it is a privilege, being a woman, to be able to achieve what you will achieve. But on your journey, you will come across many girls who will be fighting the same battle that I fought.
So next time when you see a small city girl who has broken English, or a trembling voice or needs a place to stay overnight, be nice to her, hold her hand, and help her move forward. Your mom was also once a small city girl who came to this big city, full of dreams and I found my kin of women, who helped me grow and evolve. So, my darling daughter, choose your wings, chase your dreams but while you’re doing so, help other girls achieve theirs too.
The world is cruel, I am saying it again, and sometimes it makes us cruel. And for a young soul like you, the way the world works, you sometimes end up thinking that being rude, being arrogant, being cruel is cool. But you know what’s cool. It is being good, not just to yourself but to others like you from different parts of the world. Find the difference between being assertive and arrogant, stubborn and strong-headed, rude and free-spirited.
Your friends can be from different parts of the world, with different upbringing, different opinions, different caste, different religions, different age groups. And trust me when I say, the friendship that you form with your own set of girls will be your bedrock of strength. It will help you evolve as a human being. And they will be there for you. To comfort you in difficult times, to lift your spirits when you feel down and broken. They will listen to you, will hear you out, and give you advice that you might not like but will be for your best. They will stand by you when you’re right and the whole world is against you, and they will correct you when you’re wrong even if you hate them for that.
My darling, I hope that one day you will find your own coven, the people who will understand you and will not judge you for the worst in you.
You will one day find love, be patient, don’t rush into things, and I know we all love the bad boys, but be told, it’s the good ones that are rare. Find someone who can be your friend, who will love you during your worst of days, who will fight with you but stay. Find a man who might not spoil you, but helps you grow as an individual. Who might not say the right things, but does the right things? I found a friend in your father, and I hope you will also find your friend for life someday.
You are growing up so fast and the world is changing so quickly, my dear, be kind to others, be supportive, and be helpful, at the same time, be fun, be cool, be ambitious, be stubborn.
Love, Mama
Image source: Still from Shakuntala Devi
Experimenting with experiences is the mantra of my life. Writing is a passion that helps me channel my emotions and recreate memories, publish points of view and create stories. A self-proclaimed creative soul, I read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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