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Instead of bombarding a newly-married woman with too many roles, give her space to explore her new world while following her own dreams!
An Indian bride is the epitome of beauty on her wedding day – with her attire and jewels she’s wearing. Isn’t she? Quite often, she has dreamt of seeing herself as the prettiest bride which makes her feel like a completely different personality.
She may hate all the gold and glittery clothes she’s supposed to wear but she can’t escape them, either. But when she sees herself in the mirror, she falls in love with herself!
At the same time, all this lasts only the first few days of her marriage. The world around her changes completely on her journey from Miss to Mrs. All of a sudden, her looks, lifestyle, choices and independence start to seem like puzzle pieces that need to fit into newer places. Most importantly, her name gets a new identity.
Meanwhile, there is barely any difference in how the man is seen. His looks aren’t critiqued and neither does he have to make a major difference in how he lives his life.
However, things are slowly changing in society and we are starting to believe a little more in gender equality. Let me give you my own example. I consider myself a gloriously married woman even though I don’t wear a mangalsutra.
If you’re wondering why I don’t wear it, it’s because I believe that my chord of love and luck is emotionally tangled with my better-half. Having said that, I do respect the ones who believe in wearing the mangalsutra as long as it is an individual choice to wear it.
I don’t wear sindoor or bangles very often. In short, you can say that I don’t really have the ‘traditional’ proof to show any stranger that I am married. I don’t fast for my ‘husband’s long life’ either. While it is mandatory for several women to fast, I chose not to do it.
It is my personal opinion that a married woman is a robust person who hasn’t just married her partner but his entire family. She has made a commitment to bring love and positivity to her new house and family.
The woman loves her partner wholeheartedly and (depending on her beliefs) prays for him, which doesn’t necessarily mean fasting. She knows how to face the toughest challenges that life has thrown at her.
The woman balances all her responsibilities of being a working woman and a married woman. She even helps her husband’s family grow his family by giving birth to the next generation.
So, why don’t we stop judging women according to their marital status! A married woman is still a woman with several dreams who is trying to live in her fantasy world.
Don’t bombard her with roles and responsibilities as soon as she steps into the new role. Give her space to explore her married world, let her grow and become confident in the new space.
So, whether she wears sarees or western clothes, with or without jewels, if she chooses to work or not, let her live her own life. Let the woman be herself because I believe she is the epitome of strength and wisdom.
Picture credits: Still from Amazon Prime’s series Made In Heaven
Sagarika Sahoo has done MBA and M.Com and pursued her career as a lecturer. She had short term experience in IT companies as a finance professional as well. She is now a full-time read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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