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Being an adult comes with the responsibility of taking care of ourselves, playing the grown up role and always being the rock. But is it really possible?
Walking through a winter evening to a friend’s house sipping in a warm hot chocolate drink felt like I had everything in the world I needed. The warm fuzzy feeling, the comfort of being warm and the chill in the air that felt so fresh. But then, the thought that weekend ends tomorrow came and everything felt a little tasteless.
We all crave for a little warmth and peace of mind. But very often our minds come in between. Catastrophic thoughts, excessive worry often leads us away from our peace of mind.
Sometimes I feel I have not exactly grown up. I always seem to need my father every time. Just to pick me up and soothe away my fears and worries. But being an adult comes with the responsibility of taking care of ourselves, playing the grown up role and always being the rock. But is it really possible? Or are grown-ups just people with the heart of a little child faking that they have everything under control?
Moving to the evening when my hot chocolate tasted a little bland, well, I was headed to my friend’s house for dinner. This woman has always amazed me. Even in the face of a tornado, she seemed to always have her calm. Worry is something that does not exist in her dictionary at all. Conversationally I asked her that night –
‘How do you stay so calm and composed everyday of your life? Don’t you ever get scared or overwhelmed with responsibilities or the demons in the head ever?’
While carefully cutting a piece of the food on her plate, she replied, ‘Where would indulging in the above lead you to?’
‘Nowhere,’ I replied quite startled at the stark obviousness of my answer.
‘Then why indulge at all?’ she asked.
‘I have learnt over the years, it’s very easy to get through life.
‘I am not calm and composed’, she added. ‘I am just like you and every other human. The only difference is when there is a fight between my mind and my spirit, I always side with my spirit, no matter how tempting or right my mind’s side might seem. This keeps me on tracks. It’s hard to wage a war every day, trust me. But it’s something that you need to do every day and win. No compromise either on that. Gradually you begin to learn how to do this effortlessly. Once there, you will be indomitable.’
‘Wow’, was all I could reply.
Image source: Wesner Rodrigues on pexels
A Social Media Content Writer by profession. A writer by heart. A genuine foodie. Simple by nature. Love to read, create paintings and cook. Have impossible dreams. At the moment, engaged in making those dreams read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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