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A survivor of gender based abuse is often asked why she didn't report it. Maybe she was asking for it? But how can she, when she is afraid of him?
A survivor of gender based abuse is often asked why she didn’t report it. Maybe she was asking for it? But how can she, when she is afraid of him?
*Trigger warning: There are graphic descriptions of violence against women, which might be triggering to survivors.
Why I didn’t report?
Because I was scared. I was scared he’d come out someday and burn me alive.
Because I was scared. I was scared he’d attack me for vengeance.
I was scared they would demean and accuse me, instead of empathizing.
I was scared he would attack me with acid.
I was scared that no matter how much courage I show, how many police complaints I make, how strongly I fight, he won’t take NO for an answer.
Because for him, NO means take revenge. NO means try again. NO means too shy to say yes. NO means anything except NO.
I saw what happened to the people who reported. So, don’t ever ask me why I didn’t report.
I will report, the day you are willing to understand my trauma. I will report, the day you realise that I wasn’t “asking for it”. I will report, the day you stand with me in the fight for justice.
I will report when it is safe to.
Till then, don’t ever ask why I didn’t report.
This is triggered off the recent incident in which a man attacked a woman with an axe, because she reported him to the police. Every day we hear of such horrifying cases of violence.
Image source: a still from the film Kabir Singh
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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