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Haryanvi singer-dancer Sapna Chaudhary trolled for having a baby supposedly out of wedlock. Are only married women ‘allowed’ to have kids?
Sapna Chaudhary, one of the biggest singer-dancers from Haryana, was recently blessed with a baby boy. Nurturing a life within you, and to embrace it in your arms, is one of purest emotions of the world. But according to our society, this emotion should only be experienced by women who are bound by the socially accepted ritual of marriage.
Sapna was endlessly trolled by people for supposedly giving birth to a child outside wedlock. The trolls only shut up when Veer Sahu, her husband, disclosed that they had tied a knot at a secret wedding.
This incident makes one question society’s mindset about women. Have we progressed at all in terms of emancipation of women?
We women have always been at the background, subtly working and working since generations. Dwindle around home and hearth – raise kids, cook food and take care of the family’s needs. Motherhood is one of the biggest milestones in a lot of women’s lives.
But, this same event can be celebratory for some and shameful for others. Our society expects a “male tag” along with the child. We’ve often heard on television, ‘kaun iss bacche ko apna nam dega?’ (whose name will the child take?) As if a child and its mother do not have any individual identity of their own.
Women are trolled, assaulted, slut-shamed for being a single mother or for bearing a child out of wedlock. We aren’t aware of the person’s circumstances, yet we always have an opinion about their life. The people who boast about society’s moral values, are the same ones who troll, harass and stick “she’s asking for it” tag on single/unmarried mothers.
A woman is completely capable of raising her child. She doesn’t need a male companion to do that. It’s the society that haunts her, makes her believe that she and her child are secure only if a man supports them. Our society is enough to turn the boon of motherhood into a curse.
Even the so-called ‘educated’ individuals brutally trolled Sapna Chaudhary over her pregnancy. This perfectly portrays our malignant mindset which thrives deep inside our heads, despite all our education and learning.
At every step the woman is made to realise that she is a single mother. From being questioned regarding the child’s surname, to being a topic of gossip in the neighbourhood, single mothers bear enormous pain.
Being questioned on their child’s upbringing because he/she doesn’t have ‘pita ka saaya’ (a father figure) And the groping eyes of random men following them all around, single mothers have always been afflicted.
Raising a child is no joke. We as a society should acknowledge and celebrate the efforts of each single mother instead of looking at them with disdain. From Neena Gupta to Amrita Singh and Sushmita Sen, women have proved, that despite being single mothers, they can raise strong individuals.
Picture credits: DNA India
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Anamika is an English literature student with a strong inclination towards feminist literature, feminist literary
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