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The texts that govern out present-day lives are mired in double-standards between the sexes.
The difference between being a complete man and being a complete woman.
Yes, you read it right. Biologically, both are human beings living in the same society but their lives were and are never the same. Dress code, morals, culture everything differs for a man and woman from the same community. Why community? For a man and woman who live in the same house.
We are strongly conditioned to hear again and again how a good man or complete man should be and how a good woman or complete woman should be.
A good woman should be a good daughter first, obey her parents, never raising her head or voice, always waiting to get married. There is no other goal told for a woman anywhere. Search all the mythological and religious texts. This is what you get. A woman is born to get married and that too not the man of her choice.
Next comes being a good wife. Now, all of a sudden her world changed. From day one, she should adopt to the new world, without complaints, and serve everyone from the in-law’s family. Just be submissive. Don’t raise your voice. Don’t raise your head. Don’t question anyone. Even God comes next to your husband who is an ordinary human being. Pati hi parameshwar hai, however bad he is. If she is a good wife and good daughter in law then she is a good woman.
And here comes the contradiction. For a man to be called good or complete his role is very limited. If he is a good son and achieves something in his chosen profession he is complete man. He has many choices. He can choose his profession. He can choose his wife or wives any number of them. Nowhere in the mythological or religious texts, duties of a good husband are defined.
A man can and should take care of his parents to become a good man. But if the same thing a woman does, if she supports her family or takes care of her parents or siblings she is portrayed as a selfish and disobedient woman. In fact, we can get n number of good men who were loyal sons. But we don’t have a single good woman example who was a good daughter .
And next, becoming parents. A woman should become a mother to be called a complete woman. But that is not a compulsion for man. And if the couple are not blessed with children it is always the fault of woman and the man is free to marry any number of times till he becomes father.
Next, being parents. Here also rules are different. We won’t find strong mothers anywhere.Mothers should be submissive and sometimes, even they were slayed by good sons for their fathers. And, interestingly, we never find affectionate fathers anywhere. In fact, the role of husband or father were not defined anywhere it seems. Dasaratha was an exception to some extent. A father should control his children it seems.
And even in many texts wife and children were described as crocodiles who are hindrances to man’s spiritual progress. And a man is free to leave or renounce this material world after getting married and having children.
Wah, with such ideals how can we expect better things for women in the society?
First there should be a change in the thought process and we should stop preaching the submissive women and dictator men stories. Then we can think of a change in the society.
Image source: Unsplash
Home maker at present. Worked as English teacher. My short stories and poems are published on platforms like saranga and pratilipi. read more...
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We need to stop stereotyping women's bodies, and also be more sensitive towards our children who are growing up with terrible self-confidence leading to loneliness and depression.
When Kate Winslet said, “Young women should enjoy their life instead of worrying about how they look,” it stuck a cord with me. I am one of those women who struggle with body image issues in a society heavily influenced by unrealistic beauty standards and societal expectations, and Kate’s statement was empowering.
I grew up listening to unsolicited advice about wearing clothes a size bigger than what I wear; everyone took a free ride to comment about my bra and how big it was. I have spent most of my life loathing how I look—my size, weight, clothes, appearance, skin tone, and hair. This isn’t because I’m not too fond of how I appear, but rather because I’ve been told repeatedly by most trusted people around me that I have one or more flaws.
It is imperative that, as a society, we shed our stereotypical thought not just to support women but also our children who are growing up with terrible self-confidence leading to loneliness and depression. We can significantly impact our mental health and well-being by fostering a culture of compassion, understanding, and empowerment.
Here are some online tools for startups to use for their tech needs for organising work, mind mapping, ideation, etc.
Most startups are bootstrapped, the budget is low, there is no funding, startups need some support and excellent tools to run the show. The team may be working at one place or the team is spread across the globe, but the team needs to brainstorm. Brainstorming can be fun. Listing few resources which a startup or entrepreneurs can use for brainstorming.
Bubbl.us is an interesting tool which is useful to take notes, brainstorm and organize new ideas, collaborate, and capture thoughts. It allows you to avoid distraction by focusing on task, to collaborate and share with friends, families, team and social media. Essentially no hassle of downloading any app, works on mobile and desktop. You can use the basic plan to explore and later subscribe for at $4.91/month, $59 billed annually.
Miro offers the quickest, easiest way for teams to capture, organize and visualize thoughts, solutions, ideas across the team. Other than brainstorming, it can be used for project planning, creating organizational charts and sales strategies. It runs on all devices: mobile, tablet, desktop or interactive display.
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