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Inspired by Kabir Singh, Delhi man posed as surgeon and extorted money from women after threatening to release their nudes. Why do women still fear this?
It hasn’t even been a year since the controversial ‘Kabir Singh’ was released. The movie was in the news for all the wrong reasons, including its glorification of toxic masculinity. On one hand, it raised the questions of artist freedom, at the same time, cinema is notoriously famous for inspiring people to act like the characters.
Recently, a Delhi man was inspired by one of the most unexpected things from the movie. The 31-year-old pretended to be an orthopaedic surgeon on dating apps to con women, NDTV reported. All this because Kabir Singh, somehow, made orthopaedic surgeons look sexy. So this man thought attracting girls would be easy if he posed as a surgeon.
The man, Anand Kumar, is accused of approaching women through a fake profile on dating apps under the name Dr Rohit Gujral. After speaking to them for some time, he pretended to fall in love with them and promised them marriage. He also asked them for private pictures and videos, which he then used to blackmail women and extort money from them.
Kumar’s ploy raises the question of why it is so easy for men to blackmail women by threatening them with the leaking of their nudes? Well because it is the man who is committing the crime but the onus of that also lies on the woman, thanks to patriarchy!
Women’s nudes being leaked is not a new thing at all, whether they are real or morphed, several women have had their private pictures leaked. Right from celebrities like Demi Lovato and Jennifer Lawrence to 15-year-old girls whose pictures were morphed in the #boislockerroom incident.
Many women go through this, and sadly, it is always the women who are questioned. We are asked why we shared our nudes in the first place, or why did we trust people! And why did we upload those pictures and like why do we even use the internet?
But the men are not asked anything because they are always decent right?
We need to get one thing clear- if someone has sent their private pictures to you, they trust you. And they haven’t consented to you sharing those pictures!
Society has made the leaking of nudes a crime committed by the woman. And this is now, ingrained in our systems!
In school, I remember talking to a boy from my school on Facebook. At some point, the conversation got uncomfortable and I stopped talking to him. That’s when he said if I didn’t continue talking to him, he would morph my pictures and release them.
I was a kid and I was scared. Deep down, I thought it’s all my fault for talking to a boy, having a social media account, and posting pictures online. Thus, to me, it was all my fault.
This very thought made me succumb to his requests of talking to him despite being uncomfortable. Things were sorted when I told my parents but till date, the incident haunts me. All because, for a very long time I thought that it’s all my fault. And that I am the one who should have taken care of.
Our society blames the woman when her nudes are leaked. And that is the very reason why women give in to blackmailing. All this to prevent the slut-shaming that will come their way when their nudes are leaked.
As a society, we need to make a more comfortable environment for women. We need to understand that women whose nude photos been leaked online have nothing to be ashamed about. Ever.
Our society has no right to slut-shame a woman or question her character over leaked nude. After all, what does it prove about her character? That she trusted someone whose intention was bad, was her fault? What should she be ashamed of, that she has a body under her clothes?
Neither having a body nor trusting people is an objectionable trait. What’s objectionable is the mentality of the perpetrator and the society who blame the woman.
Picture credits: Still from movie Kabir Singh and Picsart
I read, I write, I dream and search for the silver lining in my life. Being a student of mass communication with literature and political science I love writing about things that bother me. Follow read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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