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In our ‘Indian culture’, marriage is not considered as between two individuals, but between two families. This leads to the woman often becoming a puppet in most families.
We say that in India two families are getting married. Also the girl is taught that now the in laws are her family after her marriage. That she has to adjust there in any circumstances, because after marriage, husband’s house is her only home.
When a newly married woman is still trying to adjust to things, the in laws expect that she should not keep any relationship with her own family. and Even when she needs to visit at her parents’ home, she needs to take ‘permission’ from her husband and in-laws, and it depends on them to ‘allow’ her to go and visit to her parents.
Also if she wishes to help her parents financially as she was doing before her marriage, she needs to now take permission from her in-laws. As after marriage, the right over the money that she earns lies with her new family! Of course she will certainly help in her marital home if any emergency arises. But what if her own parents require the financial help?
Does marriage gives the rights of individuality and independence of a girl also into her in-laws’ hands? Do the girl’s parents lose every right on their daughter after her marriage? Why should a girl require permission to help her parents financially after marriage?
Just because it is considered normal that being a girl, she can help her parents only till the time she gets married, the responsibility becomes solely of a son, to take care of the parents for their entire life.
This mentality needs to change as there is now no place for this kind of gender inequality. Women strongly resist staying with people who have such a mentality.
They need to understand that a girl is independent even after her marriage, and her parents will have every right on their daughter and vice a versa. She has a right to go to her parents’ home as per her own wishes.
Being financially independent, she has the right to choose where she wants to spend her money, or whether she will help her parents financially or not. It should be her choice and not any compulsion on her by her in laws or husband.
Legally too, there in now no difference between a daughter and son. A daughter has the right to to keep control of her finances, and her husband should not force her to give him any detailed description of what she is doing with her money, or where she is spending her money.
There needs to be a change in many things in this society, as there is still gender inequality which today’s independent women may not be ready to accept Time it gets relegated to the past.
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