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‘Mere Saiyyan Jee Se Aaj Maine Break-up Kar Lia’ – On Women, Break-ups And Second Chances

Posted: November 22, 2019

Love Aaj Kal popularised having a break-up party while Ae Dil Hai Mushkil told women it’s okay to break-up. Don’t women too, deserve a life after a break-up?

Relationships.

The one factor this world revolves around. All of us are bound by the love of our near ones.

A few relations are by birth. And a few that we chose. We chose our friends as children. A few friends remain with us and some drift apart. The love of our life may come or we might choose them.

Two people stay together. Live together. Grow together.

But do they live together forever? Do they grow in the same zone?

Grow together or grow but apart?

If the answer to the question is yes, they are the ones who make us believe in love and set relationships goals. But, for a moment, think, what if they are not. They stay together. But don’t lead a life together. These people are growing in the relationship. But away and apart from each other.

What do they do?

Yes, I know all the if’s and but’s. They have family, and children, friends. And yes, above all, the society! We can proudly say that we are lowest on the divorce rate, as well.

Before judging me in any category as a feminist, a pseudo-feminist, a man-hater or any others, as people tend to do, I am talking about the couple! Both the man and the woman are suffering.

Both parties suffer!

Now the traditional picture is that they suffer. If they are vocal and extroverts, they fight loudly in front of everyone, no matter where they are. But they still go on living together. This together could be in different rooms for several years as they grow old and children move over. They still decide to spend their retired life together, but separately.

The new age picture might be different. Though the cases are sparingly few, there are few cases where man and woman decide to separate path and live happily ‘break-up’ after.

Who gets the happily break-up after?

Now comes a turning point! As the man decides to leave the close-knit circle and follow his heart, (alone or with anyone) he might be “asked” not to do this. The man will be asked to ‘think about his family.’ He might be accused of ‘being insensitive’ and of ‘bringing a bad name’ to the family.

If he’s involved with another girlshe would be accused of ‘capturing’ him and wrecking a home. Home-wrecking bitches! He would be the innocent man, unsatisfied by the wife (oh! Pity!) and it was his weakness that he was manipulated by a gold digger!

Oh! So sad!

She WILL be judged

That’s it. No one will ever question him, his family, his upbringing in this. On the contrary, if a woman decides to take the plunge and be happy (in her zone that she finally reclaimed) she is judged.

They don’t see the self-doubt and her moving back and forth between to be or not to be. No, she won’t be given an ounce of understanding from anyone- the society, her friends or even her family.

Her choice will directly be labelled atrocious and inappropriate for her age. They will target her character, analyse it dissect and judge it right from the time she hit puberty.

Women have zero needs, don’t they?

The rules are clear.

If, due to any circumstances, divorce or death of his wife, a man has the right to start his life all over again. No matter for how long, he needs a companion.

At the same time, if a woman seeks another chance, due to her own mistakes or life being cruel to her- oh dear! She needs to understand that she has lived enough. Now she can survive, fulfil her duties, do some social work!

Rekindle love! Huh! Such an atrocious thought to have.

Women’s bodies and souls have no needs.

And this is not just restricted to the common everyday women who still need to think that there is a way to have a second chance. This goes true even for famous, self-made women life Malaika Arora who had to face trolls after her divorce.

Why don’t women get a happily break-up after?

Women don’t get the ‘happily break-up after‘ while men are free to break and be happy! Why are we so obsessed with a woman having the image of someone who is ‘good’ and ‘perfect?’ Women are forced to die these slow deaths which are acceptable rather than them breaking away from the norms.

Why does the perfection and goodness in a society depend on the women? While we are fighting for women empowerment, women still need to go a long way before they are close to the men when it comes to being themselves and living happily after a break-up.

Isn’t it better to have a broken relationship than broken people, irrespective of gender and age?

I believe it is high time we faced reality and made the society strong enough to accept all the broken pieces and recreate happiness.

Picture credits: YouTube

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