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It was a regular Monday morning…unlike the horrifying Monday morning that Reema was reminded of every week. Riya, Reema’s elder daughter was giving instructions to the cook on what to make for the breakfast and what to pack in the office lunch box for her Dad and herself. Reema was so pleasantly surprised to see her little girl stepping up and taking these responsibilities along with a busy job.
Sumit – her son, was also ready for college and promised his sister that he will pick up the laundry on his way back from classes in the evening. The memories flashed in front of her eyes when she was the only one taking care of all these errands while kids and her husband were too busy with their work and studies and friends outside. Her chain of thoughts was interrupted by Sudhir, her husband who seemed very tired as he returned late night from a work-related Singapore trip. He apologized his kids for the travel over weekend and not being able to wake up early to help them. Kids soon realized how stressed Sudhir was. They dropped the chores at hand and settled on dining table for a coffee with their Dad.
There was fear in their eyes and heaviness in their voice. Riya hold her father’s hand and said… “No apologies please Dad…I know we all are trying our best to get all these things done without her…we are trying our best to get our life back to normalcy but this time we want to be more careful and vigilant”. “Yes dad, it was our mistake. We lost her because we never realized what she is going through, we never saw her pain and stress behind these day to day things she did to keep our lives normal. We never felt how lonely she was that added to her stress. We have learnt this lesson a hard way, but we won’t let that happen to you Dad” – Sumit added with a regretful tone.
Sudhir hugged his kids with an attempt to stop the tears rolling down his eyes. He assured them that he will never leave them by hugging his son and dropping a kiss on his daughters’ forehead. “I know it’s our mistake but I don’t agree with the punishment your Mom has given us for life. She could have told us that she is suffering and feeling lonely. I know we all were too busy making a life that we missed to make this life happier one. But still – the step your mom took was an extreme and I will never forgive her” Sudhir expressed his guilt in an angry way, knowing that he cannot change things now.
Three of them hugged each other tightly which recharged them to lead another day of their life without her. It wasn’t easy but they were left with no choice. They all repented but then …life never stops…it has to move on.
Reema could not stop her tears either. She felt so sorry for what she did. She was so pleased to see her family supporting each other in this moment of grief and to see how much they cared for her even if they could never show it to her when she was alive. She wished if she could redo things. She wished if she would have at least tried talking to her family about her loneliness. She wished if she would have taken professional help for her depression in its early phase. But she waited till extremes to happen. One day when she could not handle it on her own, she gave up, she emptied a bottle full of sleeping pills to embrace the sound sleep forever. She wished if she knew that there is no escape on this path; it was only going to make it worst.
What can be more painful than helplessly watching your loved ones in pain. What can be worst that knowing you cannot do anything. You are no more a part of their world as you are not alive and your guilt, sorrow and pain will not let you leave their world even after death…Life never stops…You just wait, longing to hear words of reason, love or play. To lash or lull you toward the hollow day..!!
Image is a still from the movie Rishte Naate
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