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She came back to India after an education in the US, for her career, and while people were surprised, she was sure of her decision.
At 18, I was quite adamant that I wanted to study Psychology in America. This ongoing debate in the house had gone through numerous phases, where we considered and reconsidered this decision multiple times.
“There are amazing colleges in India too, why go to America?” was the one question that was repeated by everyone we talked to. A majority of the people often advised my parents against it, saying why would you send such a young girl alone to study abroad? The what-ifs were never-ending. People would also say that I should go for my master’s when I was older and more mature. But who knew what would happen in the future?
However, I was lucky enough to have the support of my parents, who asked me a few times if I was sure about this decision. And when I said I was, they offered me their unequivocal support. I have no regrets about going to America to do my bachelor’s. I have no regrets about traveling to a foreign country alone to study in a foreign environment that was completely new to me.
As a child, I was shy. I wouldn’t even be able to place an order when we went out to eat in a restaurant. The 5 years I spent in America transformed me completely. I came out of my shell, learned to initiate conversations with strangers, learned how to finally place an order at a restaurant, and much more. I have no regrets that I spent 5 years in America, learning how to become the person I am today and finding a profession that I love. It was during my time in college that I was able to find that my interest lay Marketing, which led me to Advertising and then copywriting.
Today, I have made writing my career and I truly believe I wouldn’t have been able to come to this career path without the experiences I had in America. This is not to say India doesn’t have fantastic colleges. However, what I was seeking in my college education was the flexibility to explore.
It is not just this phase that I have no regrets about. After almost 5 years in America, I was at a crossroads. Should I come back? Should I apply for a master’s program? Should I turn to IT and have someone sponsor my visa?
I eventually ended up returning home and I have no regrets about that. Ask a normal person and they will tell you this is a foolish decision. America is the land of opportunities. However, for me, America was just a place to study, but it was never home. Home is where my family is and it is also one of the few reasons I chose to return home.
The other reason being the approaching date of my visa completion. While many people would hide the reason they returned, I am ok with admitting that my visa was running out, I did not have a sponsor and neither was I going to get a sponsor for my work visa. I chose to return to come back to an environment where I felt at home.
When I came back, people were surprised!
“Will you be able to adjust here?”
“Will you like the lifestyle here”
“Will you be able to do anything with your education?”
“What will you do? Get married and waste your education?”
I come from a small town but this is where home is. What was there to adjust in a place where you had already spent a majority of your life in? I grew up here, so I couldn’t understand the questions about adjusting to life at home. Sure I missed my life there, but I missed my family a lot more. And I have no regrets in admitting that I wanted to live around my family, to work around them and to spend my life around them.
The decisions I made after high school made me the person I am today. My decisions are my own, and good or bad, advantageous or disadvantageous, fruitful or not, they are mine to make and mine to live with. And I want to continue living a life where I can make my own decisions, without any regrets but with the strength to live with whatever consequences result from those decisions. But up until now, I have no regrets.
Image source: shutterstock
I am a writer and run my own content writing firm based out of my home town. Writing has always been my biggest passion, but reading and drinking coffee come a close second and third. read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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