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A new mom is in a very fragile place, both mentally and physically, but do we give her the same support as a human being, as we give her for being the 'Maa'?
A new mom is in a very fragile place, both mentally and physically, but do we give her the same support as a human being, as we give her for being the ‘Maa’?
She sat on the edge of her bed, trying to figure out how to get back into bed, partly because of the physical postpartum pain, but more so because of the hollow feeling within.
Meera was home after 3 days in the hospital where she had given birth to a healthy boy through C- section. She was glad to be back home, the home that she had set up, managed, and maintained up until last week. But something felt wrong, something felt out of place. She couldn’t find the same comfort or normalcy that her home usually gave her.
Meera stared at the bassinet and her son lying in it.
She loved him for sure, didn’t she? Of course she did. She had been taking care of him for past months, making sure all was ok, all was perfect.
But nothing seemed perfect now. She wanted the physical pain to go away, she wanted to walk, talk , sleep, eat, like the old days. She felt like she was crumbling under the pressure and responsiblity of motherhood. She wanted to go back in time just for a moment.
Yes that’s it. She wanted to go back to the old days. And suddenly, it suddenly hit her.
It will never be the same.
A new mother is as vulnerable and emotionally fragile as a newborn child. While, we as a society put our heart and care towards the wellbeing of the new born child, we seldom sympathise or empathise with the mother.
There are many Meeras in our society who crumble under the pressure of being the perfect parent just because she is a woman. We don’t need to be perfect. We don’t need to superhuman. We just want to be treated human.
A human who can err.
Image source: pixabay
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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