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Being an extroverted person, I was very active on social media, constantly updating my status, and looking at every notification... until a cousin challenged me to get off it for a month.
Being an extroverted person, I was very active on social media, constantly updating my status, and looking at every notification… until a cousin challenged me to get off it for a month.
I have always been a very social person. The kind of person who makes talking to a stranger seem like a piece of cake. I have naturally therefore made a lot of friends and acquaintances in my life. But life has a way of showing exactly where one stands in relationships through circumstances or some wise advice that comes from the mouth of a well-meaning person; and so it happened with me.
One evening while I was dining at my cousin’s place, who has been with me through thick and thin of my life, and she chided me at my habit of getting back to the phone for every single beep that I heard.
Notifications ruled my life, so much so that I did not realize when I finished the soup and started off with the dessert. Of course I hid behind the courtesies of the other family members who seemed to be involved in the get together but my cousin noticed my every move.
After the dinner while everyone settled down to watch a favourite family sitcom with home-made cookies and beverages, I joined my cousin in the kitchen table. It was a summer night and the open window brought in with it the scent of a sweet breeze scented with the flowers in the garden.
I took in a deep breath while cradling the mug of coffee in my hand.
‘How you wish you could update this to someone don’t you?’ my cousin asked observing me while drying the dishes coming out of the dish washer.
‘What nonsense?’ I retorted. ‘Of course not!’
She poured herself a cup of coffee and joined me at the petite kitchen table near the window.
As she settled down next to me she said, ‘Would you be up for a challenge like the old times?’ she asked stirring her cuppa slowly.
‘Yes, I am game anytime.’ I told her.
‘Okay then, for the next one month, can you simply not connect to the usual close buddies and people on your contact list through any of the medium that you might use?’
‘But it would be rude not to connect and moreover, they would be worried if I don’t.’ I added.
‘The ones who would really worry if you do not send a LOL to a forwarded joke would call you to check on you.’ She replied.
It was a strange proposition from a woman who was herself so much updated on social media or so I thought. But I accepted the challenge agreeing to it with the exception that I can connect with the office people.
A month went by and interestingly, no one noticed that I was gone for a month. The only ones who noticed were the people who I never messaged but were added to me on my various account handles.
‘Are you okay. No updates?’ asked one close childhood friend who I connect only when I am down.
‘What happened to juicy updates?’ was a message that came up from my siblings who I connected on a regular basis because we are family.
I am sure, had the proposition not come from my cousin she would be another one who would have asked me ‘Where I had been?’
Of all the contacts and the interactions and tags and the status updates put together, when it really mattered, there were only three people who asked if I am okay. Well, there were a few others of course, who knew of the challenge and naturally did not ask the obvious. People who I actually live my life with.
After a month, as I sat in my cousin’s house at the same kitchen table by the window, I let the frustration of the month gone by flow.
‘But I thought I mattered.’ I told her.
‘You do.’ She answered and in her wise answer I realized that in the midst of the notification frenzy, I had left aside not only the people who are dear to me, who are always there, who can drive many hours just to hug me if I need one, but also things that made up my life.
It was an emotional revelation. I sat there with mixed feelings and while I sat I looked out the window at the beautiful hues of an afternoon sky. The summer breeze blew in yet again carrying with it the scented aroma of the jasmine outside.
‘Are you sure this time you don’t want to update this feeling?’ my cousin asked.
‘What nonsense? Of course not, I answered.’ And this time, I spoke the truth.
Image source: shutterstock
A Social Media Content Writer by profession. A writer by heart. A genuine foodie. Simple by nature. Love to read, create paintings and cook. Have impossible dreams. At the moment, engaged in making those dreams read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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