When A Child Talks To You, Listen To Even What Is Unsaid; You Just Might Prevent A Tragedy!

Posted: March 4, 2019

What is going so wrong for our children, that we hear so many cases of suicide in teens and young adults? Are we listening to what they say?

Recently, I came across two cases, which broke my heart. It not only left me devastated thinking about what happened, but also left me appalled, wondering where are we heading to.

Some time ago, I read about a 21-year-old boy, pursuing his Engineering from IIT-Hyderabad, committing suicide by jumping from the seventh floor of the building. Parents and relatives did not believe that it could be suicide, and perceived it as an accident. Later on, after the inquiry, it was found that he had emailed his friends saying that he did not feel any interest in living further and how he was terrified about his future, which ultimately made him commit suicide.

What made him do it? Who is the real culprit? Parents, society, education system, relatives, friends, or higher expectations? What are we training our kid for?

A few months back a 15-year-old girl jumped from her balcony and committed suicide because of the fear of getting fewer marks. FEAR? What kind of fear are these kids possessed by? Who plants such fear in their little minds, which ultimately leads them to take their life?

People call those one who commit suicide weak, but I feel it is the toughest step anybody can take for themselves. I can’t even bear a knife cut while chopping vegetables, how do they take their own life? How much must they fear something else, that they take this extreme step?

Where are we heading to? Is there no one they have to talk with, because the option of committing suicide is not something which will come in their mind in one instance and person would just go and kill himself. The thought occurs time and time again, and just when the person is no more able to cope up with the fear or the struggle, they give up.

With the rising stress levels in society, depression and anxiety are becoming a more common disease than any other illness. Please take the signs seriously. When a kid behaves indifferently please watch it, not every kid is playing around you, not everyone is lying. Sometimes they have a lot to say and when they are gone they leave you rattling with the thought that what went wrong? In this advancing world, it has somehow become a challenging job to raise a child in a healthy environment but we’ve got to do, what we got to do.

Listen to them. Listen to what is unsaid, as well as what is said.
Spend alone time with them, try to get details of what their daily routine is.
Be their emotional coach, talk to them often.
Make them life ready, prepare them for life.
Avoid higher expectations, one thing at a time.
Be there, Be aware.

It is high time we as a parent, guardian or teacher, not just stress over their physical and social development. We need to focus on their mindset. We need to nourish them emotionally, psychologically as well. We would never otherwise know what goes inside that little mind.

Let us make our children life ready!

A version of this was first published here.

If you or anyone you know is feeling suicidal, here are some of the helplines available in India. Please call.

Aasra, Mumbai: 022-27546669
Sneha, Chennai: 044-2464 0050
Lifeline, Kolkata: 033-2474 4704
Sahai, Bangalore: 080–25497777
Roshni, Hyderabad: 040-66202000, 040-66202001

Image source: YouTube

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