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Psychologists say that the seventh year of marriage is characterized by unsettled feelings and the urge to move out of the relationship
The Seven Year Itch isn’t just about the movie in which Marilyn Monroe starred, it’s more of a theory in general. Psychologists bring out the concept saying that the seventh year of marriage is characterized by unsettled feelings and the urge to move out of the relationship.
Looking deeper, the seventh year is the period where we almost make a perfect family. Kids grow up, their demands rise up, and most importantly we forget ourselves being a “husband and wife” and live more as “mom and dad”. And this is the period where we don’t really want to be in the relationship any longer. We may also find the relationship no longer exciting and the need for “the other” arises.
Many theories suggest that humans experience physical and mental changes every seven years and that’s where marriage loses stability.
It can happen anytime in the marriage. It’s all about how you take the relationship. One partner might realize a need for a change before the other person. The lack of intimacy, sex, and fun give an open message to others. There might be some period where a simple compliment from your co-worker makes you fall for him or her. There might be a time, where you feel that your partner is boring.
Infidelity happens only when we try to escape from the problem and at the end, we find it absolutely dangerous. There is no sin in getting attracted to someone, but your happiness depends on your intelligence in understanding the fact and moving close to your spouse irrespective of all the conflicts you have.
Take the time to communicate at least 20 minutes to your partner each day, let the feelings out, and understand what is happening in each others life.
As the marriage matures, sexual life may not go on with the same frequency. Learn to talk about it, support it and strengthen the marriage. After all, both of you need to cater to each others need.
Understand that the “Honeymoon Phase” doesn’t last forever. There comes a point where the bubble bursts, and you might experience a period of dissatisfaction, conflicts arise, all which take a toll on family life. But it’s marriage. This is how the marriage map works. Conflicts do happen. Fight over everything but understand you both can’t be right and be married at the same time.
Parenting does impact intimacy in marriage. There will be a period, where you make love once in a year or wait for a time when your kid sleeps off and stays quiet. Take a break, go for a date, spend some special moments, revive the love.
No marriage is perfect. There is always something to cry about and there is always some dissatisfaction. It’s not really about seven-year itch, it can happen anytime.
Name it four-year itch or twelve-year itch, but it’s about the time you give to work it out that matters. Marriage is worth every effort you make, to work it out. It’s all about “ACCEPTANCE AND PATIENCE”, after all, the effort is worth the happiness you deserve.
Image source: Pixabay
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