Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
I put all my career aspirations on my husband when I got married, and have had a good life as a fauji wife, but now I catch myself shifting them to my daughter.
It was during a casual conversation about work culture and career growth in the corporate sector with my colleagues, that I realized for the first time what I had compromised to marry the man I loved.
The same year we got married, my husband was posted out of our city. I just decided to relocate with him wherever he went and whatever it takes. That was in 2004. It has been 14 years now.
Yes, it was my ambitious self and my career goals that I had buried somewhere long ago. But those aspirations have now starting resurfacing again. Having lived a fulfilling and happy married life, I wonder why that ambitious self has come around haunting me now.
We were a complete family, blessed with a daughter when he was posted in Chennai. For an outgoing and fun loving person like me, it has been a perfect lifestyle throughout – packing and unpacking, new places, different cultures, varied cuisines and climates, diverse work cultures, and a husband who loves exploring new places, has an extremely fine palate and loves cooking. I feel there has been a perfect fit in my expectations from life and the fauji way of life.
Hadn’t I agreed with myself to not think about a full-fledged career but also never give up on working? I did abide by this agreement all these years. I always said NO to bigger responsibilities and higher positions at the work place as it would demand relocation and staying away from family. Instead, I kept picking up whatever job opportunity came my way in every new city we lived in, moving almost every 2.5 years.
There has been no room for complaints so far. But now my heart starts sinking when I see a work stressed husband come back home. He seems to have hit the glass ceiling in a top heavy organization and planning for resettlement. It is now that I understand the cause of this restlessness inside me.
Those aspirations were never buried. I had invested those aspirations into my husband and his career. It must have been easy for me then. But now dealing with it is difficult. What scares me now is that I see myself shifting these aspirations from my husband and placing them on my daughter.
That’s how our society has conditioned us. Success is defined by excellence in academics and a steep career growth. I do not want to burden my daughter’s individuality and creativity with my aspirations of doing the best and reaching the top. I hate myself when I see the embarrassment in her eyes for scoring average marks.
I wish I could give some better direction to these resurfaced aspirations. Searching for solutions…
Image source: pexels
An academician by profession and a traveler by passion. Believes in reaching rather than preaching. A woman who has been rebooting roles ever 2 years. read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
Please enter your email address