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I am a bisexual teenager. While coming out to my mom and a small set of friends has been a positive experience, I hope that I will be able to come out openly some time.
I realised I was bisexual at the age of 15 and a half.
I had never met another queer person in my life, although I had seen them on the internet. I realised I liked girls when I got a crush on my best friend. Looking back, I can see that I’d had crushes on girls before, and there is evidence in my diary that points to it, but I hadn’t realised it at the time because no one had ever told me that it was possible for girls to like girls.
I came out to my mother about a month after I came out to myself. She took it well, but said that she was worried about me because society might not be very accepting of who I was. She remains worried even now, but is aggressively supportive of my identity, something that makes me very happy.
I came out as bisexual to a few of my friends in the next few months. The one I had had a crush on told me that she didn’t want to hurt me but she didn’t feel the same way about me, when I told her about my crush too. She’s been very supportive since as a friend, and her behaviour towards me has not changed one bit. Other friends I have told also took it well, with a couple other friends coming out as queer too, some time after I did.
There was a period of time in which I considered the label ‘pansexual’. Pansexuality is defined as attraction to all genders, or attraction regardless of gender, while bisexuality is defined as attraction to two or more genders. They overlap, but the distinction is important to some people. I’ve decided to stick with bisexual because I’m already comfortable with that label. I’ve found that that is the most important thing: being comfortable in my identity is more important than proving it to others, using labels that others think would fit me better, or anything else of the sort. Because it’s my identity and no one else really knows what my experience is with it.
One of the things that helped me become comfortable with my identity and answer a lot of questions about it was Tumblr. Whatever its problems, the Tumblr community is a very welcoming and affirming community for LGBT+ people. One blog that helped me especially was Letters to LGBT Kids, which has posts signed “Tumblr Mom” that explain identities and issues in a very loving and helpful voice. Another Tumblr blog that helped me was Gettin’ Bi. It’s an advice blog for bi people, and they give very detailed answers based on your specific issue.
Apart from that, Tumblr also gave me access to other queer people and their experiences, and has made me feel less alone on multiple occasions.
LGBT+ fiction and music have also been very important. They’ve exposed me to other queer experiences, while also telling me that things can get better than what I have, since despite me having had an almost entirely positive experience coming out, living in India as a queer person still isn’t all that can be desired. LGBT+ books and songs have let me dream of a life in which I can be out and proud, march in pride parades, maybe have a partner, and so much more.
As of now, my plan is to study and work to get out of India and possibly live abroad until Article 377 is overturned or modified so it no longer bans same-sex relationships. I don’t know what’s ahead, but I hope to someday be able to be openly queer and openly proud!
Happy Pride Month 2018!
Image source: pexels
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
It is shameful that in today's world too, women are abused and even killed for giving birth to a girl, and the infant's life is also of no value.
Trigger Warning: This deals with domestic violence, suicide, and violence against women, and may be triggering to survivors.
I am so glad that the esteemed courts are now giving the much-required verdicts regarding certain ideologies that were not at all entertained earlier. I mean we all have studied this much biology at our school level and it is our duty (our generation) to educate our elders about it.
Why someone have to lose a life to bring such awareness to the society. Delhi High Court gave this judgement concerning a case that filed by the deceased daughter’s parents against her in-laws. She committed suicide as she was harassed and tortured for dowry and giving birth to two daughters.
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