An Indian Woman’s Dilemma Of Whom To Swipe Right On Tinder To Keep Out Creeps

Tinder can easily lead to an unpleasant experience, especially in a country like India. How do you know who filter out the creeps and swipe right only the nice guys?

Tinder can easily lead to an unpleasant experience, especially in a country like India. How do you know who filter out the creeps and swipe right only the nice guys?

We have all heard about Tinder. We have also heard about how a woman is viewed if she is on Tinder. What? You on Tinder? Why???

Using Tinder in India

Well TBH, outside of India, Tinder is used as a hook up app, with absolutely n0 strings attached. This is could be because society abroad is open about sex, a basic need for any living and reproducing mammal.

In India, sex outside of marriage is a taboo, (okay okay I hear you! ) let’s say, largely. So when I first matched with guys on Tinder they would immediately as why was “I” on Tinder. Could I not manage a relationship or a marriage yet? Or to understand what I was looking for, maybe. Almost every match asked me this and I started to copy & paste my response (sorry guys).

I am not here to post another article on why Tinder is bad, shallow and absolutely not recommended. I am actually here to write about how to use Tinder better to meet people whom you would have otherwise never met in your life. It is just another app people, it doesn’t dictate your life!

Keeping out the creeps

Okay, let’s cut the melodrama here. No one, I say, no one can guarantee you a creep free experience. It is just not possible. However by placing a few filters, you could probably avoid running into a bad experience. Actually post a few heart breaks, everyone develops an ability to filter out the creeps just by looking at a profile picture, isn’t it? (Yes, that’s judgemental me!)

So, what is should be your creep filter? Whom to swipe Right?

Don’t swipe right if

  • The profile picture is not clear. If the person is wearing sunglasses in all the pictures uploaded, or if his face is not clearly visible (hiding in the shade, wearing a cap, covering his face and the likes).
  • There is no profile picture but rather a quote, a bare chest or biceps, car, flowers, pic of a celeb etc. Basically anything which makes you wonder if it is a bot or a human.
  • There is no bio at all!
  • The name is just one alphabet (yes, there are weird profiles like that).
  • There are clichéd words like traveller, photographer, trekker etc. in the bio. These are very convenient words to use, and reflect that the person is plain lazy to even write his bio.

Do swipe right if

  • You have mutual friends on Facebook (you can only log into Tinder via your Facebook profile).
  • There are interests which match yours.
  • Does not mention the words ‘hook up’ (Tip: the guys who write “no hook ups” are the ones actually looking for it).

Once you match with a profile you like, wait for the person to initiate the conversation (men still want to do that, lol). If they haven’t initiated the conversation in 24 hours, go ahead and drop a hello. The next obvious question is, what on earth do I write?

Never miss real stories from India's women.

Register Now

Conversation starters

  • Avoid generic dating language like – “hey wassup”. Instead address them by their name and pick up something from their profile (like if he is loves rock music), then ask or say something about that.
  • Chat as much as possible till you become comfortable to share your number. They will ask your number at one point, remember!
  • Once the phone number is exchanged chat on Instagram or WhatsApp or even speak over the phone.
  • Let him initiate the date unless you are sure (or have a feeling) that he is cool with you asking you out.

Tinder troubles

Online dating means you get judged. You could get ghosted because it is the easiest thing to do! Don’t feel bad about all of these. This may or may not have anything to do with you.

If you’ve figure out that ‘your’ behaviour is the cause, then great! Go ahead and work on it. It means you have identified a positive change to bring in yourself, isn’t that amazing?

If that’s not the case, like when he person says he is not open for a relationship due to what so ever reasons, then you have nothing to blame yourself for. Don’t demean or say rude things to the other person. It is their battle, let them fight it. You bow out peacefully and do what will keep you happy.

You have only a limited time on this planet! So cheer up, have fun and go for it!

Header image is a screenshot from the movie Qarib Qarib Singlle

Liked this post?

Join the 100000 women at Women's Web who get our weekly mailer and never miss out on our events, contests & best reads - you can also start sharing your own ideas and experiences with thousands of other women here!


About the Author

Niharika Bora

I am independent consultant with more than 10 years of recruiting, program management experience in multinational organisations like Hewlett Packard, Microsoft, Broadcom where I have recruited engineers across global locations and set up teams for read more...

1 Posts | 4,226 Views

Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!

All Categories