If you are passionate about teaching, then Hackberry offers you franchise opportunities to turn this passion into your profession. Fill out the form now!
Arranged marriages have always been the norm in India, however it's time to ditch arranged marriages and give love a chance. Here is why!
Arranged marriages have always been a norm in India, but here’s why it’s time to ditch arranged marriages and give love a chance.
One prominent phenomenon that has been held superior by India like a trophy, is its foundation of arranged marriage and traditions that place faith in tying two individuals together. Hinduism alone portrays eight sorts of marriages. Among these, an arranged marriage is the most mainstream and supported method for choosing two human beings’ destiny.
Our great ancestors presumably decided to arrange their kids’ weddings with the thought that if they wed them into great families (though the qualities of a ‘great family’ largely stay vague till date), since great families are relied upon to deliver good children who are undoubtedly expected to make great spouses.The same age old logic applies for young women too.
While I am happy to be born in a country known for its holy people and saints, and my brain was completely loaded down with ethics and Hindu convictions at a youthful age simply like many other Indian Hindus, I was astonished when I realised the emptiness of our value system, supposedly praised by the entire world.
The ancient rationale has clearly failed to meet the needs of present day times. Recently, one of my buddies met (in fact it was a one-to-one interview) a potential family. The groom was bashful, with a delicate voice, and didn’t appear to think much about what was going on around. In India, a wedding is not about just cohering two souls, but more about establishing a bond between two families forever. Thus, parents play the role laying down all the standard procedures of marriage. His mom took her turn. She was truly something; an old, educated lady prepared to a great degree on what she really needed.
Here’s her prerequisite sheet that she shared:
Since the time she narrated to me the entire episode, I have been rooting out those damn ethics and qualities that we, as Indians, choke upon right from the day we are born. Where do those so-called traditional values exist in this entire business of marriage? Upon cautious investigation, you would understand that arranged marriages are definitely a minor business exchange. Yes, I mean it! For one, there is product of worth included – the husband to be. Two, cash trades hand; cash is given relentlessly by the lady’s family (once in a while, more than eight zeros). Thus, determined.
This is not a just a post about lighting a flare against arranged marriages or dowry. This is only one indication of how we have failed our own ethical value systems. Perhaps it’s the ideal time for all of us to act upon those morals that have been claimed lavishly and consider marrying not based on money or necessity for household services. May be, pop in love and compatibility for a change.
Cup, flowers and hearts image via Shutterstock
Originally published at author’s blog
Me, Vineela Krishtipati, a full time dreamer and a part time blogger. Born as an Indian girl, with a big passion for life and love.I believe that the real glitz and glam is putting read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, indivisual posts do not necessarily represent the platofrom's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
My house-help asked excitedly, “I am going for wedding. Can you let me wear your red & black saree? To be honest I was stumped for a moment; I didn’t know what to say but I still said yes.
I lent a gorgeous saree to my house-help for a wedding in her family. Soon I stated getting questions if I would wear that saree again or if I was okay to be seen wearing the same saree my house-help was wearing?
We are all so conditioned to give our used clothes to our house-helps but are we okay to wear the clothes they were wearing?
A few days ago she came excitedly to me, “I am going for a family wedding. I want to wear your red & black saree, Ill wash and give it to you after the function. Please can you let me wear it?”
Beauty is a very clever, very evil capitalist tool. It traps those who have it into hanging on to it for dear life and those who don't into mutilating, torturing themselves to achieve the unachievable.
I recently wrote a piece about MP Shashi Tharoor’s tweet in which he had shared a pic with six women parliamentarians tagging them and saying “Who says the Lok Sabha isn’t an attractive place to work?”
There was a rash of comments on the post shared on Instagram, which ranged from “chill, it’s just a compliment” and “stop overthinking compliments”, to (worried) men lamenting about “these feminazi”.
Here’s my answer to all those comments.
Arranged marriages don't have to mean that women resign themselves be treated like nobodies, and that is what this backward going show tells them to.
Arranged marriages don’t have to mean that women resign themselves be treated like nobodies, and that is what this backward going show tells them to.
A few years ago, Star Plus had this show called ‘Perfect Bride’ which my mother and I followed religiously.
I had a huge issue with the name of the show and would have preferred it to be ‘Perfect Match’ instead. I also had an issue with certain things about the show – like how the boy’s mother was an important part of the journey of selecting the bride (The girl and the boy’s mother were accommodated in the same ‘house’ while the boy was in a different ‘side’ of the house – the two houses being adjacent and connected through a common door and a common terrace), but the girl’s family was nowhere in the picture.
Any marriage is a gamble. But isn't an arranged marriage, something most Indians find themselves going through, an even bigger one? How does it really work?
Any marriage is a gamble. But isn’t an arranged marriage, something most Indians find themselves going through, an even bigger one? How does it really work?
The arranged marriage system has come a long way in India through the advancement of the internet. But despite the technology, is the risk much higher today, given our changing lifestyles, transitional mindsets and complicated attitudes, with parents and children both relying on each other’s judgment?
“I am getting married next month!” Announced my friend on one of our whatsapp groups. I assumed it was a joke. I sent a laughing emoticon. Soon some other friends started congratulating her. She thanked everyone.