Check out the ultimate guide to 16 return-to-work programs in India for women
Almost all of us have some cases where we end up setting one standard for ourselves and another for others. What is your double standard?
Almost all of us have some cases where we end up setting one standard for ourselves and another for everyone else. What is your double standard and why do you think it exists?
It was a special dinner for a very special occasion. We opened the menu with great anticipation and my husband ordered the lamb. It had been a long time and he was looking forward to this dish.
“Sorry Sir, we cannot offer you Roast Lamb tonight.”
We were aghast. Not offer? What did he mean? How was that possible?
“The chef was not happy with the cuts he received today and will be happy to serve you chicken instead.”
He enjoyed the chicken but the lack of lamb was a sore point for the entire evening. Surely lamb is not something that need be imported. Why can they not stock it? Pune is a big enough city and they should have stocked the meat. We grumbled for a long time; made sure to put it in the restaurant’s feedback form, write about it on an e-review…
Contrast this with the situation just a few weeks ago when we were on a holiday in Pondicherry. Almost all the restaurants that we visited in the old town offered only specific food items on any day irrespective of the contents of the printed menu. This was based on the ‘catch’ of the day (for sea food) and seasonal vegetables. During our stay, shell-fish was not available due to a storm in the Bay of Bengal which affected fishermen. That meant, no shrimp. No lobster. No prawns.
And we did not complain. We very easily accepted their practise of serving only the freshest seasonal produce and not using stuff from the deep freezer.
Why this change of heart in Pune? Was it because we were tourists in Pondicherry and hence followed their norms. Suddenly we were all struck by this difference in our own attitudes…. Different standards in different cities…
Yet knowingly or unknowingly we (this includes many people living in my city) do this all the time.
We crave for our married daughters to stay some extra time with us yet grudge the same to our daughters-in-law. Delaying marriage till the 30s is acceptable for girls in general except our own, whom we want to get ‘married off’ as soon as possible. We easily follow traffic rules when overseas (even something as basic as using the zebra crossing) but simply ignore them at home We crib and complain about corruption, price rise, poor administration and so on yet go off on a holiday on Poll days saying ‘anyway it doesn’t make a difference’ We are conscious about cleanliness and hygiene and keep our homes spotlessly clean, only to throw the garbage out on the road. Segregation and composting are ideal topics only for drawing-room chats.
These are just some instances that easily come to my mind. There will be many more, I am sure you may have experienced many as well.
Why do we behave in this manner? Why are some things acceptable at some times and for others but not for us? Do we take the easy way out? Do we shirk responsibility? Has this trait become a way of life? What do you think?
Pic credit: Ionics (Used under a Creative Commons license)
Archana is a physiotherapist, fitness enthusiast, amateur field botanist and nurtures a few bonsai. Happiest on a road less traveled. read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
If her MIL had accepted her with some affection, wouldn't they have built a mutually happier relationship by now?
The incident took place ten years ago.
Smita could visit her mother only in summers when her daughter had school holidays. Her daughter also enjoyed meeting her Nani, and both of them had done their reservations for a week. A month before their visit, her husband told her, “My mom is coming for 4-5 months!”
Smita shuddered. She knew the repercussions. She would have to hear sarcastic comments from her mother-in-law for visiting her mother. She may make these comments directly only a bit, but her servants would be flooded with the words, “How horrible she is! She leaves me and goes!”
Are we so swayed by star power and the 'entertainment' quotient of cinema that satisfies our carnal instincts that we choose to ignore our own subconscious mind which always knows what is right and what is wrong?
Trigger Warning: This has graphic descriptions of violence and may be triggering to survivors and victims of violence.
Do you remember your first exposure to an extremely violent act or the aftermath of a violent act?
I am pretty sure for most of us it would be through cinema. But I remember very vividly my first exposure to aftermath of an unbelievably grotesque violent act in real life. It was as a student at a Dental College and Hospital.
Please enter your email address