Women's Web

Body image, violence against women, women and time – here comes this edition of the Women’s Web Pick Of The Week. Happy Reading!

“…when we replace doing the things we love with doing the things we believe must get done, most of us don’t end up happier as a result.” Thoughts on women and how we may be sabotaging our free time.

I have just begun reading Arshia Sattar’s abridged translation of Valmiki’s Ramayana, and after introducing Rama as born in the Ikshvaku clan, Valmiki says, “This virtuous man is the son of Kausalya.” Dasaratha is introduced a few lines later.

The Venkatesa Suprabatham, a familiar early-morning sound in many South Indian households begins with “Kausalya supraja Rama” – Rama, the beloved son of Kausalya. 

Starting this February, on the last day of every month, I will be putting together a list of what I think are the best posts on Women’s Web that month. What I think is highlighted because this is a very subjective exercise. These are just my favourites which I wanted to share with our readers – and remind you in case you missed any of them.

With that disclaimer aside, here is the Editor’s Pick from Women’s Web February 2012.

Careers Beyond Coding: Sairee Chahal shares her tips for programmers who want to look at alternative careers in technology. Her solid, ground-researched suggestions are worth looking into for anyone considering a career transition.

Handmade Women, with Karen Barbe: The first in a new series on women who create a business through craft, this one features a Chilean textile designer and her lovely hand-crafted products.

Moyna Chitrakar & Samhita Arni: We talk to the creators [...]

And here is the next edition of “stuff we liked” – mostly from this week, a few from the last, but all good to read!

A wife is a partner, not a baby-making machine, says the Indian Homemaker, commenting on a recent judgement by the Punjab & Haryana High Court.

Shail has a long but interesting post on “macho” men who attempt to play the blame game and fob it all on a woman. She says, “…to me a macho man is who can be himself with me, someone who may succumb to negative emotions, but is equally able to own up to those lapses, who is able to show remorse rather than turning tables and putting the onus of his feelings on me.”

The recent Park street case in Kolkata where a woman alleged that she was raped inside a car after being accompanied by some men from a nightclub, demonstrates once again what we’v always known: If you get raped, you’re likely to be blamed for it.

In this case, the woman went to a nightclub (GASP!), had alcohol (cue bigger GASP!) and had met the alleged rapists before she was attacked by them were all used as sticks to beat her with.

Anita Agnihotri’s Seventeen, a collection of short stories, many from India UnShining, delights with its insights into human nature. 

Review by Aparna V. Singh

Seventeen, a collection of seventeen short stories by bureaucrat-writer Anita Agnihotri (translated from the original Bengali by Arunava Sinha) is an illustration for any aspiring short story writer on how fiction can begin in fact and yet not be limited by it.

Agnihotri draws inspiration for many of her stories from the have-nots of this country – the landless peasants, the migrant workers, the abandoned wives, the unemployed. Yet, she does not fall into the trap of ‘reporting’ – this is fiction that serves better to illuminate India UnShining than most ‘factual’ pieces could.

Last week, I came across one of those all too common, ‘hot’ pictures of aspiring Bollywood actresses in a popular, mainstream newspaper. No doubt, said newspaper assumes that no one under the age of 13 reads newspapers, or even if they do, they are in any case bombarded by such hotness from every other medium, including the promotions for ‘item numbers’ on every television channel that there is no need to consider the age-appropriateness of any visuals used.

What really caught my eye was the caption this hot picture carried. It helpfully mentioned that the pic in question was from a shoot for a calendar that the actress was being featured in, and said calendar was a “collector’s item, just as she is.”

When does a woman become an item? And who is ‘collecting’ these women?

As a feminist who believes in women’s autonomy, including the right to wear what one wants, item [...]

Why does infidelity happen? Are Indians today more adulterous and less moral? Vijay Nagaswami’s 3’s A Crowd attempts to answer.

Review by Aparna V. Singh

There is a general perception that infidelity is on the rise today. There is also much hand-wringing one comes across in public discussions and private conversations that young Indians today are less “moral”, less committed to a once-sacrosanct institution.

In this context, well-known psychiatrist and counsellor Vijay Nagaswami’s 3’s A Crowd: Understanding and Surviving Infidelity is a welcome addition to the small selection of popular literature on relationships in India. Most work on relationships in India is either simplistic self-help manuals or research-based writing meant usually for an academic audience.

A few days ago, a Twitter user, @Nimisha_S, tweeted about the gross verbal harassment she suffered from a man walking past her on the road. A number of other users, (no doubt well-meaning people) immediately responded saying that she should have reacted in some manner – raised a crowd and got him collectively beaten up, shouted back, kicked him, punched him…

Somehow, this made me very uncomfortable. As Nimisha clarified later, she was returning late from work, after a tiring day when all she wanted to do was get home, on a rather lonely road with few pedestrians and little likelihood of help at hand. Even if she had been in a busy marketplace at daytime with plenty of folks around, is there a correct response to sexual harassment?

As women who face daily harassment on roads, in public transport, sometimes by auto or taxi drivers, sometimes in recreational spaces like parks, [...]

Travelling to exotic places and writing about them seems like a dream career; but what does it take to get going? 

Interview by Aparna V.Singh

A good travel writer’s words are like a magic carpet; they can transport us to new places and help us discover hidden delights or make us see well-known sights in an entirely new light. They serve as an extension to our senses and make us experience the flavours of destinations that we long to explore, someday.

Charukesi Ramadurai is a Bangalore-based travel blogger and freelance writer whose travel mantra is ‘anywhere but here’ – so when she is not actually travelling, she is busy planning her next trip. She blogs her travel stories on Itchy Feet. Charu talks to us about her passion and shares some pointers for anyone considering travel writing as a career option. More about her and her published work on her website.