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Contrary to the perception that nothing could be easier for a new mom (and baby), this mom had a tough journey with breastfeeding, but managed it with love and support from the family.
On the the last day of the World Breastfeeding Week, I considered it to be the apt moment for recording my breastfeeding journey. My son was born on 22nd Sep 2015 in Kolkata. I had an extremely complicated c-section that went on for 2.5 hours because of a horrible mess up by a junior anaesthetist. She kept trying epidural anaesthesia seven times through spinal injections though the end result was a delivery involving general anaesthesia. The irony was that my husband who is a doctor by profession used to work for the same group of hospitals in Bangalore at that point. After the delivery, the days were full of nervous excitement as a new mother.
Day 1 – I was in so much pain after the c-section that I could barely sit up straight to hold my son. Still, my hubby was insistent on getting the baby to latch on to me. After a lot of struggle when I managed to do that, the unfriendly nurse informed us that there was still no sign of breast milk. My baby had to be immediately fed formula milk.
Day 2 – I woke up to feel that milk was leaking from my left breast. I asked the nurse to get my baby and tried feeding him. The day-shift nurse was quite helpful and she helped my son to latch on. I could breastfeed him a couple of times. But the night shift nurse insisted that I choose formula because she had been informed about the low sugar count of the baby. Since hubby had gone back home after 2.5 days, I decided not to bother him and instead, followed her advice.
Day 3 – Hubby had lost his cool on hearing about the formula feeding last night. When the paediatrician came for his daily rounds, an irate hubby informed him about the lack of support for breastfeeding by a new mum. We were shocked to hear that the nurse had informed the paediatrician that I was refusing to feed the baby because of severe weakness. We made it clear that formula was not our preferred mode of feeding. During the day, I could breastfeed him for a couple of times because I couldn’t get him to suck most of the time. The nurses didn’t really help in guiding me.
Day 4 – I successfully breastfed the whole day with the help of the day shift nurse. I was discharged in the evening after gynaecologist gave us the permission. I came back to Dad’s place in the city. My in-laws had kindly agreed to stay on for few days since it was a little difficult for my Dad to manage this phase by himself. My mom had passed away in Nov 2011 and I had missed her the most when I entered the house as a new mum on this day.
Day 4 evening – the issue started after reaching home. The baby had peed and started crying out of hunger. I tried feeding him and faced the biggest challenge of my life when I couldn’t get him to latch on or suck. To pacify him, we even tried feeding him formula but he refused. At a certain point, the wails of the infant tore us apart. My father-in-law felt that it could have been because of colic pain and my husband gave him medicine after consultation with the paediatrician. I had never been so broken in life. My hubby, who until then was extremely hesitant to hold the new-born even for 10 secs stepped in and took charge of the situation. He rocked the baby, trying to put him to sleep. But how could a hungry new-born sleep! We stayed up all night trying to hold him in the correct position to help him latch. Hubby kept searching for videos on the net and finally around 4 am, we managed to discover the process of helping my baby to suck. Breastfeeding is a new and lonely journey for a mother but it is the support of family members that makes it smooth. In my case, this journey would have never begun without the involvement of my husband who is the one who taught me how to breastfeed my baby.
There began the journey which went on until my son turned twenty-eight months and then decided to wean himself. I chose baby led weaning and let him decide the end of this journey.
My toddler never slept through the night till he completed five months. Most of the days, he stayed up till 5 am in the morning and kept feeding throughout the night. Due to the pain and health issues post my difficult c-section, there were days when I felt like giving up on exclusive breastfeeding. At times my sciatica pain would literally push me to the verge of tears but I went back to reading on the importance of exclusive breastfeeding on the net and on a breastfeeding support group on Facebook. I always came back strong and inspired. Six months of exclusive breastfeeding was the best thing I have done for my son and this journey would have never been possible without my family’s support, especially that of my hubby.
The beginning of my breastfeeding journey had been full of challenges and giving up would have been an easy and convenient option. But I could never compromise with the health of my baby and thus went on to create some amazing memories and a strong bond with my toddler through the twenty-eight months of the breastfeeding journey.
First published at author’s blog
Image via Pixabay
With two post-graduate degrees and eight years of corporate experience, I quit my banking job to become a writer. I recently completed an MFA in creative writing. I pen down my opinion on food, read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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