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Women carry the burden of being caregivers - caring for a special child, an elder who is bedridden, or a loved one suffering from Alzheimer's. These can be labours of love, but what about me-time for her?
Women carry the burden of being caregivers – caring for a special child, an elder who is bedridden, or a loved one suffering from Alzheimer’s. These can be labours of love, but what about me-time for her?
I love you dearly, though from what I’m going to say My sentiments may not come across that way- There are days when in a sleep-deprived daze I feel I cannot go on any longer, pretending to be unfazed By the constant exposure to unpleasant fluids varied I clean silently, but sometimes I can not succeed In hiding my revulsion at the sights and odours I try to benumb myself until the clean-up is over Then sink back exhausted in the armchair
When you take a nap- yet I try to be aware At all times of your discomfort and your needs If I do not respond timely, I feel guilty indeed..
I know it is a herculean task for you and me To drive you to your appointments, definitely Yet here’s a secret I am ashamed to reveal- On those days a frisson of excitement I feel At the thought of an opportunity for interaction With other human beings- it gives me some satisfaction To know that there is life outside of these walls We can still enjoy the beauty of spring, summer and fall..
I know we both wish things were not this way When you call me for help, I can see the dismay In your eyes that yet again you need me Yet again you have demonstrated your dependency
When friends call me for a night out and I reply, inevitably That I am busy, I can see your eyes tearing up for me You talk about another caregiver to unburden me But both of us this is not possible (at least usually) With limited finances and other constraints
Besides, I have almost learnt to practice restraint Where entertainment and social activities are concerned- If I have spare time, I try to enjoy the rest I have earned..
Then there are those days when I am exhausted beyond measure And there appears my savior, those moments I treasure When a friend offers to help for a few hours or a day I feel relieved; I know you do too, more than you would say
This break from caregiving reminds me of how much I love you And why caring for you is what I would gladly continue to do…
Published here earlier.
Header image is a still from the movie Waiting
I am a woman, a physician, a mother and an aspiring writer rolled into one. I write about various aspects of my life, and my preferred form of writing is poetry (or rhyming verses). read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Being a writer, Nivedita Louis recognises the struggles of a first-time woman writer and helps many articulate their voice with development, content edits as a publisher.
“I usually write during night”, says author Nivedita Louis during our conversation. Chuckling she continues,” It’s easier then to focus solely on writing. Nivedita Louis is a writer, with varied interests and one of the founders of Her Stories, a feminist publishing house, based in Chennai.
In a candid conversation she shared her journey from small-town Tamil Nadu to becoming a history buff, an award-winning author and now a publisher.
Nivedita was born and raised in a small town in Tamil Nadu. It was for schooling that she first arrived in Chennai. Then known as Madras, she recalls being awed by the city. Her love-story with the city, its people and thus began which continues till date. She credits her perseverance and passion to make a difference to her days as a vocational student among the elite sections of Madras.
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