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A new mom speaks of her journey through pregnancy and childbirth to now - how she felt, and how she fell in love with her new baby.
A new mom speaks of her journey through pregnancy and childbirth to now – how she felt, and how she fell in love with her new baby.
You are 4 months old now… so am I as a mother. I never knew being a mother would be such an amazing feeling. You are my world now, and I know I am your world. I love you the most, and you need me the most. You make me feel complete and I make you feel secure. Your smile makes my day and my hug pacifies you. When you cry, I cry, and when you don’t eat I don’t feel like eating either.
It gives me goosebumps when you touch my face with your tiny fingers, when your talk goes on and on in your own language, and when you keep looking into my eyes without even blinking. You pee, poop and puke out all your food multiple times over me, and now you have started drooling too, but that never disgusts me.
No matter how tired I am or how bad my body is aching, I still want to take you in my arms whenever you need me. All these pains, sleepless nights, drastic changes in my physical appearance, social cut-offs, no outings, no dinner dates, all of it: believe me, they are all worth it when I have an angel like you in my life.
When I got to know that I was pregnant I was so excited, my happiness had no limits. Then started the tough time… to be honest, there were times when I thought: what was the point of having a baby when my life was already going so good? But when I saw your small face in the sonography, I realised that I needed you badly, and I was so damn desperate to see you, desperate to take you in my arms, desperate to love you immensely.
I know it sounds very filmy, but I really mean it. I want to give you everything which I did not get. I missed out on a lot of things in my life but I don’t want to regret or crib about anything, because that is what made me strong. But I will make sure to give you everything.
After lot of pain you were finally born, and when I saw you for the very first time I was on cloud 9. I couldn’t believe that I created a human being; it was like a miracle. I wanted to cry so hard, but at the same time I was smiling through all those happy tears. I wanted to touch you, kiss you, hug you right at that moment, but I could not. You came into my arms after a long wait. They say “sabr ka Phal meetha Hota hai” (the fruits of patience are sweet), and I second that. We waited a very long time for you. I still feel very nostalgic when I think about all those 9 months and the day you were born.
I always wanted to work and never thought of leaving my job, but now I no longer feel the need to work. I am growing with you, it’s a new birth for me too. I want to give all my time, my love and my attention to you.
As I said, it’s a rebirth for me and you have changed me a lot. Before you were born, I used to be very impatient, but now things have changed and they’ve changed for the better.
I love you the most, my l’il munchkin! You are my world, my sunshine!
Image source: pixabay
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Being a writer, Nivedita Louis recognises the struggles of a first-time woman writer and helps many articulate their voice with development, content edits as a publisher.
“I usually write during night”, says author Nivedita Louis during our conversation. Chuckling she continues,” It’s easier then to focus solely on writing. Nivedita Louis is a writer, with varied interests and one of the founders of Her Stories, a feminist publishing house, based in Chennai.
In a candid conversation she shared her journey from small-town Tamil Nadu to becoming a history buff, an award-winning author and now a publisher.
Nivedita was born and raised in a small town in Tamil Nadu. It was for schooling that she first arrived in Chennai. Then known as Madras, she recalls being awed by the city. Her love-story with the city, its people and thus began which continues till date. She credits her perseverance and passion to make a difference to her days as a vocational student among the elite sections of Madras.
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