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A couple of self-righteous women shamed me in public for being divorced. Is judging divorcees OK when you have no clue of their realities, ladies?
Wait! This is a women’s platform and I certainly cannot rant about women here. Or, can I?
To be honest, this is not a rant. A couple of days ago, I was excited to attend an event. An event that I thought would put me in touch with friends I had at work, people who continued to be friends even after one parted ways from the organization. A handful kept in touch with me and were aware about my personal turmoil. The others, well, they continued to fish for information all through the years. Never directly, but well, women who have traveled the length of finding their own path and ensuring they stand for themselves and their happiness – you know what I am getting at!
Divorce – this is a word that elicits excitement in the hearts of those seeking gossip and a way to pull down a woman, or even a man. While we can’t control what others speak about us, we can certainly control how we react.
So, there I was on a fine chilly evening, smiling ear to ear and elated to greet many people I knew. It’s when I noticed not one, but two women who were super duper excited to stand next to me and open the conversation on the dreaded word – divorce. I noticed every attempt was made to draw attention to my relationship status and no one ever asked me how I’ve been doing professionally. Point to note – it was mainly women.
So, here comes my basic question. What’s wrong with you, women?
Here’s my two cents on this.
Divorce is something I initiated by choice and I’m sure there are millions like me. This gave me a reason to fight the odds and begin my life after picking up the broken pieces. You might snub someone today but you might find yourself in the same spot later on. Nobody’s life is perfect, and there are people like me who definitely would never ask you about your imperfect moments. So, hold on a second before you ridicule a person in public.
If a person you’ve targeted doesn’t retaliate in public, it’s because she/he has chosen to maintain a dignified silence hoping you’d either clam up or go away! Reacting to your silly comments on a person’s life may not be one’s goal. Besides, there’s no point in arguing with a fool anyway!
Make sure that you never cross the invisible line of decency while having a conversation in public. Even if you do share a good rapport, you may not be aware about the battles one is facing. And, this is something not everyone would be comfortable discussing about in public.
Let’s face it! No marriage is perfect. Some choose to work their way around it. Others choose to find a different path. I know you are all going through your own turmoils. And, there’s people like me who are certainly not interested in knowing about your personal stories. We can genuinely answer your ghastly questions with sentences that could make you squirm. But, then, what’s the difference between you and me?
You may be in a superb spot right now. Great! That’s awesome. Remember, change is the only constant. What you consider as someone’s failure can actually be a learning lesson. Unless we fail, we wouldn’t have tried something new.
So, if you are done with your sniggers behind my back, I’d like to meet you face-to-face. If you have the courage. Let’s talk. Let’s understand where your problem lies. And let’s hope we change the perception, “A woman is a woman’s worst enemy” this year.
Peace to you!
Image source: Flickr, for representational purposes only.