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A couple of years back, I never knew the significance of #MeTime. However, it didn’t take me long to understand its importance in achieving my personal development goals.
The first few months of my married life were awesome. I left my job and relocated to Bangalore. It was a complete new set up and a new way of living – new family, new friends and new relatives. The period after marriage can be a turning point in many women’s lives as it involves a lot of adjustments.
I tried to fit into the roles of being a perfect wife and a daughter-in-law. Soon, I became a mother. Yet another role to add to the list. It was during this period, that my father’s health began to deteriorate rapidly. But I was constantly receiving advice from all directions on how to be a good mother. There were high expectations and there was pressure to perform my best as a mother, even when I was going through a stressful period.
I was multitasking and the whole process was exhausting. It even affected my sleep and this caused my stress levels to go up. Simultaneously my father’s health was distressing me. These negative circumstances led to a complete burnout, as I was stressing over things that were beyond my control. We sometimes get so caught up in the roles we play that we don’t realise we have a life of our own too. To divert my mind from all the stressors, I began reading a lot and I learned how important it is to invest some time in myself and my personal development goals.
I made it my new goal. It was not an easy task though. I tried to complete all my household chores on time. My family took turns to look after my son. We also made arrangements for a new maid. I was blessed to have her, as she took over most of the household duties and even helped with looking after the kid. These changes gave me ample time to indulge in activities that I loved the most like reading, writing and listening to music. Relaxation was brought back into my life. ‘Me time’ was the first step towards healing my mind.
It gave me time to introspect and analyse various areas of my life – the areas that were satisfying and the areas that needed work. I could reflect over my strengths and weaknesses in my personality. It gave me a chance to work on my weak points and take pride in my strengths.
‘Me time’ gave me the space and time to reorganize my thoughts. By having ample time to think about my decisions, I became a wise decision maker. I became less impulsive and took time to think before I took any important step. I began to think more clearly, unlike before wherein my thoughts were more disoriented.
Whenever trouble knocks at my door, instead of rushing to the phone to call someone, I turn to myself for support. I’ve thrown away the ‘crutches of dependency’. Little day to day stuff that used to weigh me down earlier, doesn’t worry me anymore.
If I am tired of work, a few minutes with myself charges me up. I feel fresh and recharged to attend to my next task with complete gusto.
I was so used to hanging around with family and friends that I really found it daunting when I started going out alone, especially after marriage. It was a struggle even to go shopping alone. I always needed a companion. But now, I feel confident travelling alone. I take my own decisions and I feel more empowered.
Always being around people, also means that you have to bear the brunt of their stress, complaints and their negativity. It’s not healthy for your mind, if you have to deal with this negativity on a day-to-day basis. ‘Me time’ gives you a break from all the stressors, that can be in the form of people too.
Last but not the least, ‘me time’ has tapped my creative potential in so many ways. I began to write. I created a blog and my thoughts began to pour out like a fast flowing stream. There was so much to pen down. As a result, I became an avid blogger and an article writer. I valued myself for my talents. It helped me explore an unknown territory.
Being alone is not the same as being lonely. When you are lonely you crave for company. Being alone simply means you are comfortable and secure in your own company. It doesn’t mean that you stop hanging out with friends or your loved ones. It only means that you are powerful enough NOT to run away from your own self.
A lot of women feel guilty to give themselves quality time. The truth is, ‘me time’ is an absolute must for our own well-being and to work towards our personal development goals.
Honestly, it took me a lot of time to enjoy being alone. Now, I enjoy my ‘me time’ thoroughly and I can’t do without it! I have finally come to the conclusion, that ‘me time’ can give us valuable experiences and can assist us to emerge more powerful than ever before.
Do you also love having your #MeTime? What are the ways in which you indulge in it?
Published here earlier.
Images source: Diana Pinto